The Lesson I Learned from an Icee

April 26, 2023 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I’ve often thought about how some memories are stuck in my mind, and others seem to have slipped away from me. For instance, I remember waking up when I was five years old from a nap on the floor of my room. I don’t know why I wasn’t in my bed; I assume I was playing and merely slept where I was. That said, I awoke to a puppy licking my face. I don’t remember anything after that, but I remember the first time Samson, my golden retriever pup, and I met. It’s adhered to my mind.

I remember walking down the hill to the neighbor’s house, having been invited to come over for a cap gun battle, only to be ambushed on my way down by the three neighbor girls wielding their cap guns and blasting me away after jumping out from behind the trees that lined the hill. I don’t remember anything else from that day, but I remember being surprised and happy.

Yesterday, I was brought back to another time in my memory. My wife and kids and I had gone to Sam’s Club to get a couple necessities. In particular, I needed a new pair of jeans. I tend to kill pants. I’ve tried $100 jeans and $45 jeans and everything in between. However, no matter the price or the claims of the brand, the pants tend to die on me after about six months. So, several cycles ago, after a recommendation from my dad, I purchased my first pair of $10 jeans (although they have increased in price now to $14). These jeans lasted me, surprise, six months before giving up the ghost. So now, I buy cheap $14 jeans and save myself some money.

Anyway, after shopping for jeans and all the other random stuff you pick up at Sam’s that you never intended to buy before walking in there, we paid for our items and my wife walked over to the snack center and got the kids some Icee Slurpies as a treat. She took their picture as they stood there enjoying the sweets. However, my mind was taken back. When I was a kid, we didn’t have a lot of money. I don’t think we were poor, but there wasn’t a lot of money for things like Icee’s. My neighbor and her three girls and my mom and I often did things together during the day. They were home-schooled and I was an only child. So by default, we were all the best of friends.

One day though, my neighbor’s husband got a promotion at work. As such, when we went into the local K-Mart, all of us kids got an Icee as a rare treat. I know some of you reading this might think that it’s odd to believe that an Icee could stick out in my mind, but maybe the remainder of the story will clue you in as to why. Our neighbor, Chris, handed each of her kids an Icee.

Ashley got an Icee, and her response was, “Thank you!”

Courtney got an Icee, and her response was, “Thank you!”

Angie got an Icee, and her response was, “Thank you!”

And finally, Michl (me) gets an Icee, and his response is SLURP! SLURP! SLURP!

Suddenly, my Icee is gone, as if it has merely vanished from my hand. Looking up, I see my mom standing there, slurping on my Icee. She raises her eyebrows and glances down at me. I am shocked.

“Next time, you will remember to say thank you,” she says and walks away with my Icee.

She drank the entire thing. The saddest part is, she doesn’t even like cherry Icees. There was a similar lesson that happened earlier in my life with a Snickers bar, but that’s a story for another time. Some of you may think the lesson cruel, I’m sure. However, while I am sure I did cry, I don’t remember crying. What I remember was a lesson my mom taught me. To this day, I remember to be polite. It was ingrained into me to show respect and thankfulness to someone who is kind to me. It was a big deal for Mrs. Chris to buy us those Icee’s. At the time, the amount of money it took to buy all of us kids those Icee’s was a lot for her, and at that time, I didn’t show appreciation for that. True, I was just a little kid, but it was important for me to recognize the value of what I was getting. Just like a pair of jeans that obviously aren’t worth $100 to someone like me who is just going to kill them in six months, an Icee to a mom who is pinching pennies for the good of her family is a big deal. And it was a big deal to us, but I didn’t recognize it for what it was and my mom wanted to reinforce that value of thankfulness. She wanted to engrain that value into my head enough that I would remember it. I don’t remember crying, but I remember the lesson.

I was standing over to the side waiting for my wife to get the Icees for the kids and I didn’t hear if they said thank you to her when she handed them the treats. So, I can’t say if the direct lesson has been passed down to my own offspring. However, I can tell you that they are thankful for the blessings they have. True, like all kids, they must be reminded from time to time, but I think the value has been instilled. So, as I sit here sipping my coffee and thinking back, I must smile, I have a good momma, who taught me how to live life in gratitude and thankfulness; not just to her and my dad, but to God for all the blessings I have been given. I hope in the end I am able to give back some of that blessing to others.

D. Michl Lowe

The Loss and Gain from the Pandemic

March 29, 2023March 30, 2023 D. Michl Lowe1 Comment

I was talking to some people a while back, about thinking positively and how this can impact one’s feelings about negative situations. I relayed to them some of the events from the past couple of years and how negative they could be thought of. The pandemic dropped into our laps as a society in January 2020 and by February, most of the world had shut down. We were in our homes and quarantined from February through most of the summer. In fact, schools really didn’t even go back to full-time and in-person until January 2021. During that time, my entire family caught COVID in July, during which time I was in bed for nearly two weeks, barely able to even sit up due to the disease.

A month after that, Katarina came down with MIS-C and was in the hospital for nearly a month. Some of that time we were worried that she wouldn’t make it. Sometime after that, my Mother had a heart attack and was in the hospital for a week, and then my Uncle Ron passed away after contracting COVID. All in all, one could argue that this has been some of the worst years of my and my family’s lives. However, as I told these folks, I am not sad. I choose to think about this time of my life from a different perspective. A more positive perspective. Truthfully, a more spiritual perspective.

My perspective is shaped by my trust in Jesus Christ. Have bad things happened? Of course, but let’s look at these events differently. There’s been a pandemic and life closed down for a long time and many people were hurt by this. However, for my family, my son was born in August 2019 and his mommy was able to take off from work from August till Christmas of that year. She went back to work in January 2020 and was only there for a month until the pandemic hit and she was “forced” to stay home… with our son, for the remainder of the year. Then we were on and off again beginning the next school year and many of the days she was able to be with him again. So honestly, my son has benefited from having his mommy and daddy home with him for most of his life; what a blessing!

My entire family caught COVID in July and I was severely sick. There was a point where I sat Alicia down and I had a very serious talk with her about what she should do if I were to pass away. However, I didn’t. I made it through the illness without having to be hospitalized. Thanks be to God. A month later, Katarina came down with MIS-C and nearly died. However, thanks be to God, she was spared a premature death. I understand the blessing our family has been given. Our lives have been forever changed by that hospital stay. Katarina will never be the same person she was before this. I will never be the same father I was before this. Not saying I was a bad dad, but I do some things differently. I feel differently about what it means to be a dad, what it means to be a Christian, and what it means to be a husband and man after God’s own heart.

For the last 20-some-odd years, my Uncle Ron and I didn’t speak. There was a rift in our family and no one had contact with each other. Then he reached out. We were hesitant to even meet with him, but thank the Lord we did. Our relationship was able to be mended. The wounds of the past, while still scared were being healed. Words that had laid dormant for years were finally said. Forgiveness was given and God stepped into the gap that we had forged. For the first time in years and years, I was able to hug the man I had seen as my Grandfather. And then the pandemic came, he caught COVID, and he passed away.

I could look at this and yell at God, “It’s not fair!” However, I don’t. Not because there isn’t a part of it that isn’t fair, but because of how merciful and thoughtful God has been. He worked on the hearts of us all to give us the time we needed to heal the brokenness in our relationships. To look into ourselves and realize that we were holding onto the hate of the past and needed to seek forgiveness from each other and God. I praise His name that He had the kindness and mercy to give us that opportunity! He knows what the future holds. He knows what we need most. I look at the last several years and see a lot of pain, hurt, sorrow, and loss; but more than that, I see how God has been working through all of it, present and always seeking our best. Always looking to turn pain into understanding and thankfulness. I can’t look back at the pain, without knowing He was there throughout it, never leaving us, never forgetting us, and never stopping His love for us. Praise be to His name forever!

D. Michl Lowe

One Last Hug

February 2, 2023February 2, 2023 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I had a dream about a dead person. A person I knew long ago. I didn’t know this person as an adult, I knew them when I was just a kid, a kid in high school. In the dream, we were at a festival of some kind, there was music, and people milling around talking and having fun. People were meeting with old friends and chatting, there was laughter and good food. This person and I were going to perform in some way, I don’t know how maybe we were going to sing. Anyway, this friend of mine was doing some stage makeup for me.

This wouldn’t have been uncommon for this person to do this for me back in the day. They often did our makeup before the performances I was in; of which there were many. Anyway, she was doing my makeup, talking to me, gently whipping away mistakes, and just being their normal self. Suddenly, the haze of the dream was drawn away from my eyes and saw her. I knew she had died and knew I was in a dream. I stood up with intense sadness in my heart and began crying, the tears rushing down my cheeks.

Then she stood with me. “You’re dead,” I cried. “I know you’re dead, but you’re here.”

“I am here,” she said. “It’s okay. It’s really okay.”

I stepped forward and hugged my friend. It was a hug from years and years ago. When I was just a kid who was hugging a friend that he loved. She cried too, but her tears were not tears of sadness, but of joy that she was able to hug her friend again. I realized I was the only sad person at the festival. The people were around us were talking, laughing, and loving each other in friendship and family. It was a beautiful thing, and yet I continued to be sad.

I woke up, tears wetting my pillow, stunned. I’ve had several dreams like this in the last couple of years. Dreams where I have seen friends of mine who have gone on before me into the afterlife. My mother-in-law always says that when you dream about someone, that’s the Lord’s way of bringing that person into your mind to have you pray for them. What do I do with dreams of the dead though? I’m not completely sure. What I do know is that I pray for their families and those left behind.

I’ve lost several friends and family in the last several years and I think that may be catching up to me. Loss is a difficult thing. Sometimes, you weren’t as close as you would have liked to have been. Sometimes you were very close and the loss seemed personal, like the person’s death was a slight against you. Not that they wanted to leave, but that God wanted to harm you by taking them. The sadness and anger can be almost overwhelming. I don’t feel angry. I don’t blame God. Maybe I haven’t been hurt enough to feel that. All I know is, I miss my friend, and I’m glad I got to give her one last hug.

D. Michl Lowe

Even Stuffies Have Scars

January 23, 2023January 23, 2023 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

My daughter came to me with her stuffed bear. We referred to all stuffed animals as a “stuffy”, or the plural form, “stuffies”. She was maybe three years old and already the bear had issues. His fur was bare in many places, rubbed off from love. The velvet of his nose was rubbed down to the plastic underneath. He had both of his eyes, but he had been hugged and drug around our house so much that his stuffing had been compressed. When I say compressed, I mean that he looked like a limp rag just out of the wash, but my daughter loved him. She loved him a lot.

We had no idea where this particular stuffy had come from. When we had our first child, many gifts came into the house from so many generous people that often, where things came from getting lost in the shuffle. However, whatever generous person got my daughter this bear may never know the impact they had on her life with that gift. Not to embarrass her, but she is currently thirteen and still sleeps with this bear. So back to the point, at the age of six, my daughter came to me and said, “Daddy, my bear is all lumpy. Can you fix him?”

I looked at the little rumpled thing, its head flopping off to one side. By all accounts, this thing should be thrown into the trash. As mentioned above, this little stuffy had been worn down the quick, in my eyes he was worth nothing more than the bin for sure. However, when I looked at my daughter, that was not an option. In her eyes, this was a precious companion; useful, needed, important, and loved. Throwing him away was not an option, giving up on him was not an option.

I took the bear in hand and looked him over. “I can restuff him,” I said. “But he is going to have a scar.” I can sew, but I can’t sew well. However, while my wife does sew, she hates doing it, so the task falls to me. I am the clear choice when it comes to these tasks. That being said, I knew the stitches would show when I was done. She agreed. I took some stuffing, a pair of scissors, and my needle and thread and got to work. I snipped open the little bear’s hip and began the process of replacing the stuffing inside. When the stuffing was complete, I sewed his hip back up. As I had warned my daughter, the stitches showed; there was a scar. Over the years, many a stuffy in our home received scars from “stuffy surgery” by my hand.

I think about this and wonder if this is how God thinks about us. We may look at someone who seems worn out, wasted, lost, and by all accounts ragged. But God, just like my daughter sees someone precious, worthy, and in need. He calls out to us to reach out and heal this person, but we reject the idea. If I get involved, I’m not going to be able to help. There will be scars. God is okay with scars. In fact, I think sometimes he uses our scars to remind us to turn back to him. He calls us to intervene in the lives of others, even if our help might produce some scars. Scars are evidence that healing has been done. They are evidence that someone cares enough to request the healing for us.

D. Michl Lowe

I am Fragile and Vulnerable

November 23, 2022November 23, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I was recently asked to give a talk with a reading group through our church about my book, Prayers from the Valley. They are going to be reading it soon and in February I am supposed to go speak about it. I have struggled with that. What should I talk about that I haven’t already said in the book? For me, writing the book was spiritually cleansing and maybe a form of therapy. I was recently reading a website post from Steve Laube a literary agent whom I have sent purposed books in the past.

In the article, he talks about how books about sick kids or their parents are often not published because those books are so common. Many people write books after such experiences and if every one of them was published by a major publishing company, then the market would be flooded. This makes sense. Basically, if you aren’t already established as an author, have a large reading base, or are famous, that form of a book just won’t sell well. It also makes sense why my book was (kindly) rejected by his firm.

However, in that article, he also said that you should write the book anyway. Specifically for the reason’s I listed above. For those of us who write, writing is a way to process life. Be it through poetry (not me, hahaha), fiction, non-fiction, or just a journal, the process of placing words on a page creates a meaningful understanding of the life and ideas presented. In my book, I needed to process the spiritual implications that I don’t have everything figured out. That I am not the one in control. That God is NEEDED in my life. Basically, I am vulnerable and still in need of God.

The other day in church, I felt the spiritual need to stand up and testify to the congregation. I told them, that I wanted to tell them what I was thankful for. What I said, in short, was that I was thankful for our church for serving the church community and the community at large in South Charleston, WV. Specifically, I am thinking about the ways in which our church becomes “Jesus with skin on.” I have looked, but I can’t find where that phrase comes from. I know it’s a reference to John 1, where it says, “he became flesh and made his dwelling among us.” But other than that, I’m still not sure. However, my church does this well.

Just over the course of the last two years, in our church and many other places, there has been extreme loss and pain. We nearly lost Katarina and many in our church and many connected to our church did lose their lives. Each time, the family of God stood up and entered into life with those still here. They prayed, they loved, and they were there. I am thankful for the community of God that is Jesus with skin on for those who need Jesus.

Over the last two years, I have learned that I need Jesus, not just as my spiritual heavenly father, but I need Him in the form of other believers. I need that Jesus with skin on, to enter into my life and hold me at times. Realizing this, I have found myself taking on that role as well. Looking for ways to be Jesus with skin on for others. How can I hold the lost and lonely? How can I enter into life and be with the hurting and the hateful? Sometimes I find myself frustrated with someone or feeling betrayed and I suddenly think, how can I show this person love? How can I be Jesus with skin on for this person?

Am I vulnerable? Yes, absolutely yes. Am I frail? I am. Does that position me to be vulnerable to others’ pain? Yes, thankfully, yes.

D. Michl Lowe

I Saved Over The Book I’m Writing! 😳

November 4, 2022November 14, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

At the beginning of the week, I deleted my book. Well, to be clearer, I saved over it in Microsoft Word. As soon as it happened, I realized the error. Hours later, I couldn’t get it back. The whole thing was seemingly gone. I paced back and forth, extremely upset. It wasn’t anger at the computer or really anything other than anger at myself. It was my mistake. I thought that OneDrive had been backing up my documents for me, but it hadn’t. If I were a man who cursed, there would have been cursing.

After a while, I remembered I had uploaded a version of the book to Amazon as a test a while back. I logged in and downloaded the document. It was mostly complete, save for about two of the newest chapters and hours of editing. Another issue was that the document was not in Word, it was a PDF version. I can convert a PDF to Word, that’s not an issue, but the formatting would be all off, which it was. So, in the end, I had to take my blank book format and recopy the PDF page by page into the blank book document formatted how I do my books.

This entire week, I have been working on and off trying to get myself back to where I was on the project. Currently, I am working on the last chapter that I had deleted. Most of the edits have been re-completed now. While I was at it, I also did some major formatting that I had been meaning to do anyway. Since I was going page by page, I might as well get that done while I was at it. Near the beginning of the week, I sent my author friend Justin Crary, author of Archangel, a message detailing what had happened. He replied, “Look at it this way, what you write now will inevitably be better and if God intended it to happen, it will be exponentially better. Heck, even if He didn’t intend for it to happen. He works all things for good.”

I sent a message back to him, “-glare- there you go, bringing spiritual truth into my anger…” But he was right of course. As I am working on this last chapter of the book that I deleted, I already can tell it’s better. The narrative isn’t as rushed, which I often have trouble with. I am calmer in writing it and better paced. I feel good about my mistake. It isn’t clear to me if it was divine providence yet, but for all, I know it could be. Sometimes, God must take you by the scruff of the neck and tell you to slow down. To look at what you are doing and make sure it is honoring Him. I hope everything I write honors Him. Even the fun stuff, like a fantasy novel.

D. Michl Lowe

The Blessing of Lost Sleep

September 4, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I’m currently sitting in my son’s bedroom at 2:03 a.m. on a Saturday night. I have to be up for church in the morning, but at least I don’t have work. He woke up with a leg ache, a common problem for my kids when they have run themselves silly during the day. For him, it is often pushing a toy truck back and forth between the kitchen and living room, over and over. For my middle daughter Ellie it would be doing cartwheels over and over.

Either way though, the result is pain and a crying child in the middle of the night. After getting him some medicine for the pain, I sat rocking him and thinking. I have three children and along with my wife, we have spent many an hour awake at night with babies; truthfully, she more than I. That being said though, it has often upset me or made me cross; being awakened from sleep, drug out of bed, changing midnight diapers or soothing a crying child for any number of reasons. But as I sat here tonight, my little son, who just turned three, cuddling into my chest, I made a point to realize that I am lucky.

First of all, I have a child to wake me up. Beyond that, I have three. I have three amazing children to worry about, be awakened by, and be able to provide care for when they need me. I and my wife are good parents and we can care for three children well. I work in the school system and get to see the children of many different families, as such, I see both the good and bad results of different families. I am thankful that my children are part of an amazing one.

I have help. My wife is an amazing mother and a stupendous spouse. She sacrifices and pursues excellence in all her endeavors. However, her charge as a mother is one that she has not only mastered but continues to teach me as her fellow parent. My parents live down the road, they are always there helping and loving my kids. My mother and father-in-law are there as well, providing support and love, always. Aunts, Uncles, Godfathers, Godmothers, friends, church members, teachers, and so many more.

They say it takes a village and my kids have one. I am often discouraged by the news these days. The hate, discourse, and outright violence of humans are at times scary and bleak. But when I look at my kids, I have hope. They are and will be a bright spot in that darkness. Christ’s love will shine out from them as I hope it does from their parents. I recently joked with my good friend that all Christians should have at least three kids if at all possible.

That way you can make more Christians than are going to go on to glory when you leave this word. But truthfully, no one can predict the course of one person’s life, even a life that is brought up in the church with loving and good parents. But dang if it doesn’t help. I am thankful for my son’s leg aches and the opportunity they provide. I am thankful for a crying child at night. God thank you for letting me hold my children and be a comfort to them. May I never forget the blessing of lost sleep.

D. Michl Lowe

Is There Absolute Truth?

August 10, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe16 Comments

This is a tough question! The simple answer is yes. The more difficult answer gets into the idea of morals and how we understand the concept of sin. How do I know something is wrong? There are honestly several ways. One of the main ways is looking to God’s Holy Scripture. Through reading God’s Word, we have a direct link into the mind of God and what He thought was important for us to know. Some things aren’t mentioned in there. However, you can use logic and reason to begin to understand the overall mind and nature of God. Through the tool of reason, we have divine wisdom in the areas where he was silent. So, let’s talk directly about sin and how it manifests in our lives.

What is sin?

Sin is the direct willful turning from God’s known will, direction, or the law. It’s not your actions that are the sin, it’s the decision to turn away from God; to go your own way. This is why no one sin is greater than any other. I turn from God and then I do something. The sin is not the action, but the decision before the action. The action is the result of the decision to turn away. All sin is equally abhorrent in the eyes of God. Because of the fact that all sin is the same, we are able to understand that God is the ultimate decider of what is “wrong” or what “sin” is.

Without God, there is no sin. There is no wrong:

If there is no God, then there is nothing I can do that is wrong. Let’s pretend for a moment that God does not exist and everything I believe has been a lie. Would it be wrong for me to steal a candy bar from the supermarket? Nope, if I can get away with it, it’s not wrong. There is no basis for you (my accuser) to say that what I have done is bad or wrong beyond your own opinion or that of others. Basically, if you don’t believe that God is the ultimate truth and decider of the moral law, then you have created some sort of system for yourself. Perhaps you believe that the state is the ultimate authority or the government. However, laws can be changed. If an extremely rich person decided to throw all their money into making it legal to have sexual relations with little kids, they could probably get that sort of thing passed into law. But does that make it suddenly right and okay to do that? I would argue no, but under a system where government or the state makes up what is moral and immoral, then it becomes right and okay. The same could be said for people who make the decision for themselves if what they are doing is right or wrong.

Now, some of our decisions have to be based on our knowledge of God’s nature, but ultimately we believe that God will lead us in a direction through prayer, the study of His Word, and conversation with other believers into knowing his correct direction for us. None of those assumptions can directly contradict God’s Word or His known nature. For example, I don’t believe God would have it in His will for your life for you to murder your whole family and then use their bodies as shields to defend yourself from the law as you run naked down the street. That’s just not in His will and it would directly go against the known law of God and His nature. However, if a person decides that their own feelings and thoughts are the ultimate form of truth, and that is the truth, then there is nothing stopping them from making decisions and creating any form of moralistic code they want. They literally become their own god within their own mind.

If their own morals dictate that murdering their family and running down the street naked while using those bodies as shields is right… who am I to say they are wrong? Their opinion is just as valid as mine if there is no higher power that is greater than our own desires. This gets into the idea that all ideas are not equal. Not everyone can be right. Someone has to be wrong. You will hear it said that all paths lead to “god”. No, they don’t. They just don’t. You can’t believe that unicorns and fairies save your soul and still get into Heaven. It just doesn’t work that way. There has to be a greater form of truth. There has to be a higher power, other than your own will and selfish thoughts. Without God to lead us, we are lost in our own will.

D. Michl Lowe

Finding God In The Mundane

August 3, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

Finding purpose in your life is not as hard as people like to make it out to be. As Christians, we like to pretend that God is so complicated; that we are lost in understanding His will for our lives. I remember taking a course at our church several years back that was meant to help you understand what your spiritual gift was. It was a fascinating study, but ultimately, I’m not sure it helped me to understand what God was calling me to.

How was I supposed to use what I had found out to serve him? There was a guide of course that had lists of things one could do to use their gifts, but ultimately, I think such things are largely useless. I’ve been thinking for some time now, that we often put the label of “unknowable” on God’s will and use this excuse to remove guilt and remove the action that God would have us take. God’s will in your life is clearly laid out in scripture. Here are four questions to help you understand God’s will in your life.

Is where I am at or what I am doing, leading me towards sin?
- If yes, then this place might not be where God has called you to dwell. If no, then understand that God calls us to serve His purpose wherever we are and whatever we are doing.
Is what I am doing at this place acceptable within the known law of God?
- If the Bible speaks directly against what you are doing, then you can be sure that what you are doing is NOT within the will of God. The Bible is the authority on how we understand God’s will in our lives. He will not violate his own Word. I have had many people tell me that they “feel” like God is saying something is good when that thing directly violates God’s known law within scripture. Praying about these issues is VERY important, but it’s easy to get confused and believe that God is telling us one thing through prayer that violates His Word in the Bible. Don’t fall into this trap.
Do I have a calling in my life?
- A calling is something we know for a fact God has called us into. With this in mind, we should always be aware that if God has called us into something, we should be doing that thing. Now, it should be noted that oftentimes, God calls us into a task, but might have us complete that calling in a way we did not expect. As an example, someone might feel called to be a pastor, but God calls them to do so in Africa instead of Wisconsin.
What are you doing now that doesn’t glorify God?
- Understand that there are basically three modes in which we live out our lives; actively serving Christ, actively serving the Devil, and operating in mundane activities. If you are actively serving Christ, then you can be mostly sure those activities are within His will for your life. Obviously, if you are in the process of committing sin, then you are outside of God’s will. The third option of operating in mundane activities is a hairy one. These activities are things like going to the grocery, watching TV, having friends over for dinner… basically anything that isn’t what we might call directly serving Christ. However, it’s easy for us to get caught up in these mundane activities and lose sight of God’s plan.

I have thought a lot about the mundane activities we fill our lives with. I find myself questioning if I personally spend too much time in those mundane activities. Coming home after work I find I just want to plop down in front of the computer and watch funny cat videos. Doing more than that just seems like too much effort. However, I have begun to look at my mundane activities as opportunities to serve God. Ever since college, a good friend of mine and I have been playing card and board games on a fairly set schedule. Several years back we started going to a gaming convention and were saddened by the complete lack of any Christian influence in this population of geeky kids and adults. We decided to take our mundane love of geek culture and games and put it to work for God.

It started with our own gaming night at our local church. During this time, we did some devotions and played a lot of games. It has evolved now but continues to provide a place where people can come, bring friends, have a bite to eat, and play some games with good Christian men. Taking something that was mundane and transforming it into something useful for God wasn’t hard. It was necessary for us to take a step back and examine our mundane activities and be willing to give those activities to God; allow him to overtake that area of our lives. We have been created for a mission. An important mission. The mission is to live for Christ in all areas of our life, regardless of where we are or what we are doing. Jesus wants all of us, not just the part we “give” on Sunday mornings.

D. Michl Lowe

Swimming into Patience with Other Believers

July 20, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe2 Comments

So my and Alicia’s kids were swimming the other day. We were on a trip to our old university, MVNU for a contest for our oldest called Blast. I have a pretty broad range of kid ages. Katarina is nearly 13, Ellie just turned 10, and Nikolai will be 3 in August.

That being said, I find it interesting to think about the differences in my kids. I could talk about the differences between the boy and his sisters, but that is really a topic for another time. What I would like to talk about though, is the differences in swimming ability. I know that sounds like an odd topic to discuss, but stay with me.

When my girls were young, Alicia and I went to great lengths to teach them how to swim and it seriously took years for them to actually get good. Which is fine, but it was very slow. These days, Katarina is fearless! She will go down any water slide and swim any depth, she’s a literal fish.

Ellie, she is just starting to really get her sea legs. The slides, pictured above, were not big at all, but those are about at her limit of not being nervous about. Any bigger and she might still be timid about them.

Nikolai though, that kid is fearless with a capita F; to his detriment. He had no idea of when to stop, when not to go, when to pause, no idea. He is clueless and it’s dangerous. He often gets himself flipped over or in over his head and requires rescuing.

So why does any of that matter? Well, it got me thinking about spiritual maturity. My girls took a while to learn how to swim and how to do it properly. Some people are that way with God. They have to take things slow and while they may be “saved”, the transformational side of Christianity is a gradual process. It takes them time to mature as a Christian and to fully embrace the full idea and lifestyle of that spiritual reality.

Notice I still refer to that person as a Christian. That’s because my assumption is that they are because they are saying they are. Someone may not be on the same level as you spiritually. To put it in JRPG terms, you might be at a level 25, while your friend might still be a newbie at a level 3. You may have been saved at the same time, but the maturity level spiritually is different. You can’t expect your friend to come questing with you in a level 25 zone, when they are only level 3.

The thing is, if you point out their lower level, you are not only going to hurt their feelings, and probably your friendship, but that’s not your place. In the midst of life, you can point out Biblical truth, but be patient with those around you and be aware that they may still be working through something you conquered long ago. Along with that, there different areas of expertise as well. Something you might be an expert at, your friend may be a beginner, but also, you are for sure a beginner in many other areas as well.

It will do us all good to be patient with fellow believers and lead each other with grace and understanding. One of my favorite sayings comes from a Zen teaching, it says, “do everything with a beginners mind.” Which basically means, be humble and be patient with others. Good advice for us in dealing with fellow believers.

D. Michl Lowe

The Hero We Need

July 13, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

My family and I enjoy going down to the Smokey Mountains. It makes no sense because we hate going to Myrtle Beach and the Smokey Mountains are basically Myrtle Beach without the water. However, we love this place and come sometimes twice a year. It’s one of our favorite places to visit!

This year, we have been staying at the Dollywood Dreammore Resort and it’s been pretty great. There are always a couple of standard events we do every time we come here. We always eat breakfast at The Apple Barn, and we always eat dinner at Paula Deen’s Family Kitchen.

As we were waiting for a table yesterday evening, we decided to sit outside in the rocking chairs and watch a lightning storm roll in. As we sat there, my son Nikolai was running around playing on the patio. Suddenly, a woman fell while walking by the curb. My little two-year-old son ran over to her, gently picking up her bag and trying to help her up as well. I ran over too, but she was already mostly up when I got there.

She turned to me and asked if he was my son. I said, “Yes, he’s my son.” She got tears in her eyes and said, “You’re doing something right.” She wasn’t hurt, she was just overcome with the emotion of the situation. I walked back to my little rocking chair, stunned in a way; feeling an overwhelming sense of unearned pride.

My girls, Kat and Ellie are fantastic! They are shining lights and amazing young women. I couldn’t be more proud of them. They aren’t perfect, but they are turning out to be fantastic Christian ladies. However, my little boy is only two; seemingly too young to be aware of honor, chivalry, or a sense of protection of others… Or so I thought.

His boyhood instinct was to run over to this woman and help her. As she said, maybe this old dad is doing something right. Maybe his momma is as well! Whenever one of us sneezes or coughs, Nikolai will always ask, “Daddy, are you alright?” and I or whoever sneezed will say, “I’m alright, thanks.” Compassion, love, and care; are common instincts we couch in Christian morality in our household.

I look around at the instability of our world. I wonder if maybe there were more Christian moms and dads out there who lived lives reflecting Christ, maybe we wouldn’t have as many issues in society as we do right now. Maybe if we lived like Jesus, we would have more little boys who would run to the rescue and fewer of them who run into places with murder in their hearts.

P.S. Nikolai’s shirt was perfect tonight!

D. Michl Lowe

The Sacrifice Of The Self

July 6, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

The idea of giving up one’s life for another is not an easy one to swallow. A good man will do it for those who he might truly love. He will step into the fire to retrieve his child caught in the midst of the house blaze. A mother will gladly rush to protect her child and die in the process. We all fear death. We all fear the loss of our conscious selves. That idea of being, aware. The great mystery of how we know we exist. This lack of understanding is clung to like the lifeboat that it is. Without this idea of personhood, we float into a meaningless void; into the lack of significance.

So, looking into the eyes of another and understanding that their life is more precious than yours is something foreign to the human condition. We are so locked into our idea of existing that it’s beyond our understanding that our lives aren’t meant to be lived for ourselves. To push yourself beyond what is human selfishness is unthinkable. However, I truly believe that in the last moments of the martyred they’ve understood. When that soldier looks into the eyes of the man he just took a bullet for, when the last drops of blood are leaving the wound of the one who gave their lives, I believe they understand it. They understand the value of “other”. How do we attain that understanding now? What does that life look like? The life of personal sacrifice. The life of embracing the death of the self… while still alive.

It seems like this is too philosophical an idea to begin to understand. It’s beyond the minds of the mortals to undertake what only gods take for granted. A sense of understanding about what is truly important in life. I sat the other night in a little rocking chair, putting my two-year-old son to bed. We still sit in the rocking chair together and read books before bed, then we sing, pray, and finally just rock. Back and forth, back and forth. It’s a simple ritual. However, the other night I was rocking my son, and I gained some clarity to this understanding that it’s not about me. I looked at my little son and realized it was about him. Not only that, it was about my two daughters, and my wife, and my best friend, and his kids, and the families they will have and their families and their families, and so on.

I am on earth to give of myself to others. So many others. With that realization, came the realization that I am here for those I disagree with. If I can’t love the person on social media who calls me a name, then what am I doing here? What’s the point of life if I cant love and sacrifice for those I know, don’t know, and those who I will never know. I will most likely never live long enough to get to know my great-grandchildren. Maybe I will, but I most likely won’t. However, what I do today, the words I write, the things I do, and the things I say will echo through time and the ripples of my life can reach those people. I hope I can be a bolder that creates a lasting wave and not just a little ripple. My life is going to be way too short to just stay silent, stay safe, stay entertained, and stay out of the lives of those around me.

D. Michl Lowe

The Need for Honorable Men

June 29, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

This is the introduction to the book Men of Valor, by D. Michl Lowe.

I have sat back and waited. Waited on the church. Waited on my friends. Waited on society. Waited for them to start moving, to wake up and see that our world is dying. The earth itself seems to be groaning. There is a palpable tension in the air. Evil is no longer allowed to be called evil and even those who prey upon children are starting to no longer be vilified. Not to mention the devastation of abortion. There is a great need in our culture to begin unraveling the problems that most of society no longer calls sin. It must start with Christian men. It must start with them standing up to be counted.

Creating a new way of living. Showing the love and truth of Christ to the dying world, but also working to show that men are culturally here to stay. That masculinity is not something shameful, but a prideful way of expressing gender that sets us apart from our wonderful ladies. We are strong, resolute in our faith, and gentle in our demeanor. We are silken iron.

The sad truth of today’s culture is that it has become normal to understand that men are stupid, clumsy, fat, lazy, and just useless. We see characters like Chandler and Joey from the sitcom Friends who are bumbling idiots only really interested in sex. The women of the show manipulate them constantly using sexual innuendo to get what they want. In one episode, the boys have rightly won the right to live in an apartment from the girls, only to have the two girls kiss each other in front of the boys in payment for the apartment. The boys leave the apartment saying, “Totally worth it! Then go into their separate rooms giving the impression they are going to go masturbate with the memory of what they have seen. These types of scenarios play out constantly in this show.

Or we see the characters Homer Simpson and Peter Griffin from The Simpsons and Family Guy, who are always doing stupid things. Countless times in shows like these, men are nearly always seen as the idiots and women seen as the voice of reason. I understand that this is done for comedic purposes, but men are the butt of jokes nearly all the time. It is rare to see a woman portrayed in this manner. Sitcom comedies do this so often, that the idea of masculinity is now seen as negative or even wrong. This is sad because masculinity is needed. Yes, that is a bold statement to make, but one that needs to be made. Masculinity is seen as unintelligent and even crass and uncouth. To some degree, men have not helped this stereotype with our sometimes-stupid antics, but this does nothing to degrade the need for masculine men.

Matt Walsh a popular online blogger and conservative commentator said it well;

“Disrespect for men is a joke to us now. A little while ago I stopped on the way home from work to buy my wife some flowers. As she rang me up, the cashier quipped: ‘Uh-oh, what’d you do?’ I wasn’t particularly amused, but I chuckled. She continued. ‘I don’t know if that’ll be enough to get you off the couch tonight!’ Ah, yes, the old “husband is punished by his wife and sent to the couch” meme. I’m not sure if this actually happens in real life, or if it’s an invention of 90’s ‘all men are fat, witless, oafs’ sitcoms, but the popularity of the stereotype is telling. Is this how we see husbands now? A man gets ‘in trouble’ with his wife, she scolds him and puts him in time-out on the couch. Now he must placate his alpha-bride by showering her with flowers and jewelry. Men are painted like children or dogs. They can be shooed off their own beds by their wives and sent to cower in the living room until she permits him to return. This is only slightly less offensive than the cliché of the sadistic wife who punitively withholds sex from her husband. ‘You didn’t clean the garage like I told you. No sex for you, mister! Next time, follow my instructions!’”

In our schools, typical male childish behavior is seen as deviant and a problem. Psychologist Michael Thompson has famously said that girl behavior is the gold standard in schools and boys are treated like defective girls. It is sad that boy behavior is so misunderstood and hated. Our young boys are treated with disdain and are misunderstood, recently in the news, I saw where a young boy in grade school bit a pop tart into a gun shape and started playing with it. He was promptly expelled from school. This type of intolerance isn’t right. Our teachers are hamstrung in being able to implement discipline for actual negative behaviors and mandated paperwork for oversight has made it difficult to even teach what needs to be taught, so time afforded for simple physical play (an important need for young boys to exert energy) has become a secondary thought even though it’s also a mandated requirement.

This is not to say that women are less than men in any respect, but the idea that the sexes are both the same is not just silly, it’s dangerous. We are different right down to our chromosomes. Men have one X chromosome and one Y chromosome while women have two X chromosomes. Chromosomes are basically the fundamental building blocks of humanity. They contain DNA, which is the pattern by which humans are created and built. Within every human DNA is what makes a person an individual. The combining of their mother and father’s DNA has created each person; those patterns are used to create a completely new human being. Men and women are not the same and to pretend otherwise is honestly just silly.

I feel as though men are lost in our culture today. There isn’t a place for men to truly be men and embrace our masculinity. They search for meaning and purpose. One of the biggest forms of entertainment in the modern age is video games. It is estimated that by 2019 videogame yearly sales revenue would be around 41 billion dollars, not a small industry to be sure. It is a well-known fact that men tend to be consumers of the higher-end video game industry. While many women have broken into casual gaming, which accounts for many of the skewed statistics stating that women make up more than 50% of gamers, they continue to be underrepresented in the mainstream gaming market.

We would refer to most male gamers as “core” gamers in this respect, not players of Candy Crush or Angry Birds, as fun as those are. Some of this trend is changing with games that are marketed directly to women, but now it’s just the way things are. Why do so many men flock to video games? Besides the sports genre (which I believe is popular for different reasons), many of the games we see men playing involve stories and situations in which the player may assume the “role” of a hero of some kind.

Within the role of the male hero is the question, “What does it mean to be masculine?”. This idea of masculinity is idealized in the role of the male hero. Most men have a desire to be the hero of their own existence. In many PC games, one takes on the role of a hero that starts off as mostly a normal person, but through adventures and fulfilling quests begins to gain great power and becomes a leader in the vast world in which the game takes place.

In first-person shooter games on consoles and PCs alike, players often take on the role of a super soldier in a world of the future where aliens are trying to basically end all life in the universe. Through these super-soldiers, players can become the hero of the entire universe, saving humanity. It is often as if the player can save their game, sealing themselves away for a time when humanity might even need them again in the future. Self-sacrifice is a very pure form that often rises in these storylines.

While not a videogame, pen and paper role-playing games like the classic Dungeons and Dragons present a very solid argument that men are gravitating towards the realm of role-playing for a reason. In these games, you choose a “role” to play and through a form of guided storytelling, you can become the hero of your own story. Now there are a lot of reasons why all genders play these games, but for men, it often has to do with this innate desire to gain significance. God gave men this desire for significance and heroic inspiration. In Psalms 57:2 David says, “I cry out to God Most High, to God who fulfills His purpose in me.” God calls all his people into glorious purpose. For men, this is often a desire to achieve significance and meaning. This isn’t a bad thing. In the realm of working towards achieving Christ’s purpose and meaning for our lives, men can find a true significance, but when we look past God to the world for significance, something is lost.

A while back, I sat in a very questionable chair in the back of a dirty and rundown shop in a very bad part of town. My wife was worried that I was going to this place; a day before, someone had been shot only one block from this store. There were about eight of us and the unkempt appearance of the other men around me might have off-put many (along with the smell), but I was comfortable in this place. Dungeons and Dragons had a way of bringing people together. However, on this day, the man on my left was not very happy. He had failed in several rolls of the dice and his character was on the verge of death. He angrily shouted at the Dungeon Master (the leader of the game) that it wasn’t fair, letting multiple expletives leave his person.

After the game was over, he was packing up all his books and little plastic figurines he angrily threw his pack on and stormed from the table, leaving the shop. His manhood, his meaning for life was so wrapped up in the fictional character he had created, that losing it was like losing part of who he was. It was sad to see. Shouldn’t there be more for men in this life? Shouldn’t there be more for them to strive for than just a fictional monument of meaning?

The men of this generation are lost, children. Society has taken away the villains and often even denies that such a thing exists. It is no longer good or evil, there are only differing opinions and cultures. No one is wrong, and everyone is right. There isn’t an outlet for masculinity in American society that is not in some way shunned. Men are now the aborted children of society and it is time for them to take a stand and become something more than just a joke. It’s time for true purpose to come back into the darkened hearts of men.

The truth of the issue is, there is evil in the world. Some issues are not questions, but facts. There is a great need for men to be willing to stand up and be accountable to the society they live in. It is time for us to step onto the dais of history once again and take a stand for what is right. There are certain truths in this world that should be observed and should be written in stone. There are ways of viewing the world that is right. The way men treat their fellow human beings matters. One of the greatest tragedies in this life is that evil prevails because Christian men choose to do nothing. The children of God have set on the sidelines for too long and allowed the truth to be kidnaped.

The truth has a nasty way of being unpopular. No one wants to hear the truth; people want you to agree with them and validate that what they have already decided is okay in their minds. There are no real attempts to understand the other side; there is only the manipulation and deceit of tolerance. It is this idea of tolerance that’s only there to convince you that this other person is on a higher moral level. Do not be deceived into the idea that tolerance and understanding are right because “everyone is okay”; that every idea is right and moral. Acceptance is only possible if you don’t disagree and don’t speak out. According to society, the status quo of tolerance and acceptance must be maintained above all other ideals. Understand the spiritual and intellectual warfare that is going on and continue to speak the truth regardless. This is a verbal war that will not stay in that realm for long, violence and death are already in the streets.

The stance of moral and Christian truth will only be allowed for so long. Freedom as an idea is slowly moving towards being parallel with the status quo. This isn’t a call to rebellion in the sense of militaristic action, but it is a call to a rebellion of conscience and behavior. Within a framework of honor and Christian faith, men can begin to unravel the current culture of compliance and tolerance. Standing for Christian truth is not hard, but it will cost you. In fact, at some point in the future, it could cost you everything. Still, what is your soul worth?

“For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul?” Mark 8:36.

Men are becoming what society has wanted them to become, pitiful creatures that are ashamed of their own masculinity. The men make a case to dismiss God so that they can ignore his law and live their lives in selfish admission. Distractions and sin have led to a willingness to live a blinded life; a life ignorant to their own destruction. Hedonism is the new vogue and it is the greatest lie that men believe to be true. Brief moments of pleasure and fun are constantly sought out and chased after. Downtime is filled with small screens, meaningless memes, and videos of cats with bread on their heads. What are men doing with their lives? What purpose is there? What meaningful significance is there to this existence if we pass into history without changing anything for God’s better plan?

As Paul Bois said in his Oct. 17th, 2017 Daily Wire article,

“…when knights surrender their swords, beasts shall devour maidens.” In a country and culture ruled over by Harvey Weinsteins, one can only raise the question; as Paul asks, “Are there any knights left”?

This has been the Introduction to Men of Valor, by D. Michl Lowe. Available now in full from this website. or at the link here: https://amzn.to/3PiWUoz

D. Michl Lowe

The Armed Woman: Raising Shield Maidens

June 22, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

Men are strong, like stronger than even most men realize. I’ve had many conversations with people about the reasons why I carry a firearm every day. I realized this when I saw a person rip a bed that was bolted to a concrete floor, out of that floor and single-handedly barricade a door with it.

They were coming down off drugs and their body was going nuts. That being said, I also realize that most burglaries that happen are not single-person jobs, but multi-person jobs. While I might be able to take one person, maybe, a multiple-person assault though means I am overwhelmed and am unable to protect myself or anyone else.

As such, I have always felt that self-protection is a human right, and one of the best tools for stopping a person who intends harm is a firearm. It’s why the police carry them, it’s also why militaries the world around carry firearms of all kinds. They are effective. I’m not going to pretend that guns don’t harm people, they do. They are very good at that, especially in trained hands. As such, I train. Not as much as I would like, but I have attempted to not be unskilled.

However, I have had fewer conversations about why I am raising my two girls to do the same thing. More than ever, I believe our young ladies should be armed. Men are strong, and while they don’t have a monopoly on violence or sexual assault, the majority of those things are done by men. As such, a woman who is most often physically weaker than any given man should have the ability to even the field of combat.

What is scarier than a woman who is defending herself, her children, or even her husband? I am under the firm belief that a good man should always be ready to defend his family and himself, but let’s face it, sometimes men fail at being good men. Sometimes they are not there for their family or their wife. Beyond that though, even good men can’t be everywhere at once and sometimes the lady of the house is on her own.

Now, do I wish the pain of having to take a life on my wife or my girls? No! Not at all, my goodness no! I would never wish such a thing. But I also am working to prepare them for battle should that nightmare visit them. I would rather they killed an assailant than be raped or themselves murdered by them.

So what does that look like for my girls? I am teaching them to safely handle firearms at a young age. I am taking them shooting and teaching them the fundamentals. Beyond that, I am teaching them fundamentals beyond just firearms. I am teaching them to use knives and to carry those as well.

Up close, sometimes a knife is a better option. Or if you are in a crowded place, a firearm might not be a good choice. I am teaching them to be aware of their surroundings. Teaching them to get their heads out of their phone or a book when in public. Keep their head on a swivel! Glance behind yourself while walking to be aware of what’s around you.

Keep a small (but powerful, over 70 lumens) flashlight on yourself at all times. At night, a person with a flashlight on and shining into dark corners is not only more aware but also sends a signal to all would-be attackers that this person is not an easy target. This also leads us into a discussion of clothing choices. A woman’s clothing choice should allow them to continue to carry their EDC (everyday carry) items. A thigh holster, a belly band, an in-the-waist band holster, a knife clipped in a pocket, or the waist of their pants or dress. There are even ways to carry a firearm in a special bra called a “flash-bang”, which is hilarious and well named in my opinion. I refer to these sorts of ladies as Shield Maidens, taken from Lord of the Rings. I believe all women should take on this title.

Do I wish that title didn’t need to be taken? Of course, I do. However, in today’s world, we can’t allow ourselves to sit idly by and twiddle our thumbs, while wolves prowl the woods. There are people who will say that they can’t bring themselves to carry a firearm, or even a knife and I understand that. Sometimes, the experiences of this world wound people or bring them into themselves in such a way that they feel they could never do such a thing. I understand that. However, that is not an excuse to be complacent about your own safety or the safety of those in your charge. This is why I mentioned awareness and flashlights. Seventy lumens of light into the eyes of a person will blind them temporarily, even in sunlight. While this is not foolproof, it is better than nothing and has worked to save lives.

So this is how I am raising my girls. To be Shield Maidens. Those willing and able to protect both themselves and others should the need arise. I hope it is me, but if I am unable, I pray they will rise to the occasion.

“Hinder me? Thou fool. No living man may hinder me!"
Then Merry heard in all sounds of the hour the strangest. It seemed that Dernhelm laughed, and the clear voice was like the ring of steel.
"But no living man am I! You are looking upon a woman. Eowyn am I, Eomund's daughter. You stand between me and my lord and kin. Begone, if you be not deathless! For living or dark undead, I will smite you, if you touch him."
The winged creature screamed at her, but then the Ringwraith was silent, as if in sudden doubt. Very amazement for a moment conquered Merry's fear. He opened his eyes and the blackness was lifted from them. There some paces from him sat the great beast, and all seemed dark about it, and above it loomed the Nazgul Lord like a shadow of despair. A little to the left facing them stood whom he had called Dernhelm. But the helm of her secrecy had fallen from her, and and her bright hair, released from its bonds, gleamed with pale gold upon her shoulders. Her eyes grey as the sea were hard and fell, and yet tears gleamed in them. A sword was in her hand, and she raised her shield against the horror of her enemy's eyes.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King

D. Michl Lowe

Eight Christian Parenting Thoughts

June 15, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I stood at the door to her room and looked down at my watch, it was 1:21 a.m. nearly 7 hours had passed since I had put her to bed. I had to be ready to leave for work in about 5 hours. The door to her room slowly opened and a little face peeked out through the crack. I opened the door, picked up my two-year-old daughter and put her back in the bed, closed the door, and waited. Two minutes later, the door slowly opened again and a little smiling face looked out the crack; repeat. Raising kids is challenging. You will never be perfect and you shouldn’t try to be. You won’t succeed.

Just realize that you will grow in understanding as things go on. If we are going to talk about steps to making parenting better, you should make sure to fully discuss the topic of discipline with your spouse, future spouse, and/or boyfriends. Honestly, all of the above. Discipline is one of those aspects of parenting that if not agreed upon, will tear a relationship apart quicker than almost anything. Discussing this topic is a big deal! Make sure, whether or not you two fully agree on how it is to be done, that you both agree on what will be done. Consistency in discipline is a major key to success with parenting. So, here are several key ideas to keep in mind when disciplining kids and teens.

If your marriage is not solid, your kids won’t be either. This is number 1 for a reason. I say marriage because actually being married is more than important. A solid marriage is the best thing you can do for your kids. I understand that sometimes it’s not possible to be married anymore or that the other parent isn’t willing, but if at all possible, marriage should be on the table and put up on a pedestal above all other relationships. Put God first in your life, then your marriage, then kids, then work, etc. Priorities of importance should be examined and agreed upon.
Prepare by talking with your spouse about what you will do when discipline issues arise, and they will. Talk through issues you know you are going to face as they come up and before they happen. Don’t undermine each other, even if you don’t agree with how your spouse is handling a situation. Back them up, then talk about it later. If the way you all want to handle it changes, let the kids know that the rules have changed. Children are pretty flexible and can adjust to almost anything. If you need to change the way you are doing things, do it.
Tell your kids what your expectations are for them and allow them to live up to those expectations. Let them know what the consequences of failure are. Hold to your commitment to discipline and make sure the kids fulfill their side of the commitment.
Realize they are only (insert the child’s age here) and don’t fully understand things the way you do. If you need to do some research into age-appropriate discipline, that’s why we have google. For that matter, understand that kids are going to make mistakes and even outright defy you. Know this going into the situation of being a mom or dad and prepare yourself to take what your kids throw at you with a degree of humor, understanding, and firm diligence.
Get on your kid’s level, physically and verbally, to speak to them and make sure to end ALL discipline with a discussion of the event, error, etc. Understand that those leading children to the feet of Jesus make a huge difference to them in connecting the truth of scripture to everyday life. Make sure to show them cuddles and love at the end. I find a discussion about how I feel about them and why I discipline them (because I love them) helps them to understand why they got in trouble and how they can avoid being in trouble in the future.
Don’t give discipline in anger. If you are angry, it’s time to step back and distance yourself from the child. Regain your own composure and then return to the situation. Recognize your own frustration. Seriously, putting your child into the crib and walking away when they are screaming will not scar them for life. Sometimes you have to let them cry. Let me say that again, sometimes you have to let them cry. If they are older, step back and give them some space and then come back. They might need some time to compose themselves too. Distance gives you both an opportunity to consider your tactics for discipline.
For a baby in a crib, that you are trying to get to sleep through the night, remember the 5,10,15 rule. Let them cry for 5 minutes and then go in to check on them and lay them back down or rub their back till they are calm. Then leave for 10 minutes; repeat other steps, return again after 15 minutes, and repeat the above steps again. Under no circumstances should you pick them up or remove them from the crib, unless there’s blood or you know they are wet, poopy, etc. Allowing a child to teach themselves self-soothing is important and you will thank me for telling you it’s okay to help them learn this.
With teens, realize they own nothing, you own basically everything they have. Be willing and take the time to understand what is most important to them (this applies to all ages) and then be willing to take that away and give it back to get compliance of behaviors. If it’s not motivating enough for them to change their behaviors, then you are wasting both of your time in disciplining the child or teen.

Discipline can be challenging. There are times that it will seem overwhelming to you. Don’t give up hope. Consistency in effort and a united front as a couple are the keys to good parenting. Remember, royally screwing up kids takes a lot of effort. Kids are very resilient. They bounce back from completely horrible stuff. They say, that as long as a kid has at least one adult in their life that actually cares for them, they can make it. Throughout my time working with kids, I have seen kids go through absolutely horrendous abuse, and yet once they are away from that abuser and are in a secure place with people who care about them and love them, they thrive. So basically, as long as you are loving your kids and giving them clear boundaries, most of the time they are going to be fine. It doesn’t take a village to raise a good kid, it takes parents who are involved and love their kids enough to discipline them.

D. Michl Lowe

Would I Marry My Wife Again?

June 13, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe1 Comment

On a recent trip back to my and Alicia’s university where we met, my kids asked me an interesting question. “Daddy,” they asked. “Are you and mommy going to renew your wedding vows at MVNU when you get there?” I purposed to Alicia at the gazebo down in the grove at MVNU and then we got married in the very spot where I purposed, in the gazebo. So that particular place holds a great deal of meaning to us as a couple. However, in the car that day, I told the kids, “No, I don’t feel the need to renew my vows to Alicia because I still love her and my vows hold just as strong today as they did back then.” But it got me thinking. Alicia and I just celebrated our 18^th year of marriage on June 5^th of this year, 2022. Looking back, would I do it all again? Would I marry this girl who I fell in love with back in 2000 and then married in 2004? Would I go through it all again?

Alicia and I met in September of 2000 in a field at MVNU in the middle of campus. My roommate at the time introduced us and she was sitting on the ground eating a hotdog with her roommate. I just said hi, and didn’t really think much about it… she was just a girl. Not really knowing my roommate very well (we didn’t know each other before coming to school) and of course not knowing her, I could have never expected what the future would hold. But we became friends. We started to hang out at school and over time, she became more than just my friend. There were struggles during our dating relationship. There was learning that had to take place. I had to come to an understanding of who this gentle girl was. She was unlike anyone else I had ever been interested in. She was completely different than me. I am loud, excitable, passionate, and silly. She is quiet, withdrawn at times, and gentle.

Here’s the thing though, she was wonderfully unique. She wasn’t like the typical girls I would have gone for. She was different, but so very much what I needed. She grounded me in a way. Brought me back to earth. When I would get flighty or would become too much, she would help to bring me back. She was/is honest with me. Men in particular need a lady to ground them. There are a lot of good things about men. Lots to like about these burly boys, but it takes a woman to help those boys truly become men. Not saying you have to have a lady to be a real man, not at all, but I will say this… becoming a true man is much harder to do without a good lady at your side. Together, men and women make each other better. I know choice in a mate is important too, but in general, I would say I am correct, that men and women make each other better. The weakness of masculinity is made strong with the feminine. The weakness of the feminine is made strong in the masculine.

Can you find Nikolai in this photo? He’s hiding.

With Alicia and I, I think we have made each other better. I am a better man because of her. What is it Tom Cruise said, “you complete me”? I don’t know if that’s the right idea, because I have always said that two incomplete people make for a poor couple, but in our case, while I don’t consider us half-people, I do know that knowing her, loving her, and being with her has made me a better person. She doesn’t complete me, but I am “complete”ly in love with her. More so today than yesterday.

So, would I marry her again? Yes. Would I have children with her again? Yes. Would I go through the struggles we’ve had with Kat again with her? Yes. Would I go through all the strife of finding lost Grandparents with her again? Yes. Would I go through Nikolai being put into the NICU again? Yes. Would I go through the struggles of early marriage finances and even struggles in finances today again? Yes. All of everything that has been hard, that has been said, that has left us feeling lost, unhappy, fearful, misunderstood, and mourning. Would I go through all of that again? Would I put my trust in Christ to lead me down the road he has? Would I take her hand again in all of everything that life has to offer us and look into that uncertainty and struggle again with her again?

Yes.

With no hesitation, yes.

My darling, my love, the very flesh of my flesh. I love you. I will love you; I have loved you, and I will continue to love you. You are mine, and I am forever yours. I will fail you, disappoint you, and someday, I might even lose you… but I want you to know that I love you and nothing is changing that.

I love you.

D. Michl Lowe

Christian Non-violence

June 9, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

Throughout my life, it was always an understood fact that self and others’ defense was a perfectly reasonable and accepted fact of the Christian life. I knew about Christian pacifists, specifically those in Amish communities, but while I understood these groups to be Christian, I always believed them to be more legalistic in their dogma. I mean, these were the same people who said it was “wrong” to wear colored clothes and drive cars. I understood why they did what they did, but I didn’t see those things as wrong, and especially didn’t see them as “sin”. However, in more recent years, there seems to be a much larger growing population of Christians who see themselves as pacifists. When I was writing the book that would eventually become Men of Valor, I did a lot of research into this way of thinking. At the time, our church was following a man named Francis Chan, a pretty amazing teacher of the Gospel and this guy had a friend named Preston Sprinkle, a fun name, I know.

Preston Sprinkle seems to be one of the leading modern voices for this idea of Christian non-violence. In fact, he wrote a book about it, first called Fight, and later retitled Christian Non-violence. Preston is an amazing writer. His level of research is amazing and, in the back of his book, he talks about wanting to grab his shotgun and shooting the thug, he says, “The mere thought of someone harming my family stirs up something fierce.” He then goes on to ask his reader, “… are you 100 percent sure that God won’t intervene?” I’ve been asked this basic question several times. Basically, implying that by stepping back and allowing the evil person to continue unimpeded, you are showing faith in Christ.

To me, this just reeks of the story about a man in a sinking ship. He prays to God to save him. A man comes along in a rowboat and offers to save the sinking man, but he refuses. Two others come and ask him if he wants to be saved, but he refuses each time saying that he is waiting for God to save him. Well, the man drowns. He gets to Heaven and asks God, “Why didn’t you save me?” God replies, “Well, I sent you three rowboats!” God has given man the ability to be a man. “Haven’t I commanded you; be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

He would not require something of us if he hadn’t also given us the ability to accomplish it. As men, even modern men, we yearn for a time when we can stand up and be counted among the great men of the age. Men often attempt to sate this urge with video games and movies about heroes. However, in these arguments we see Christians trying to get us to ignore this inborn, God-given desire to save those whom we love. This isn’t right. Why would God call us to gamble with our family’s lives? God has called humans to a higher standard. One that compels us to put our own lives on the line to save those we love; even if it means killing an evil person. We wouldn’t want to do it, might even beg the person to not make us do it, but in the end, we would do it, if there were no other option.

In another section of his book, Mr. Sprinkle says, “Do you own a gun? Is it loaded? Are you a good shot? Are you a better shot than your attacker? If you are such a good shot, then why not shoot the gun out of his hand?” This is where Mr. Sprinkle really loses his credibility. He makes several other statements about guns and then backtracks and says he “owns several guns” as if that means he is somehow an authority. I am not an authority in any way but know enough to know when someone is just fear-mongering. The ending crux of Mr. Sprinkle’s arguments really falls apart when he says, “But not all enforced pain is violent. It all depends on the intention.” He is calling for you to beat up an attacker and just not kill them.

I mostly agree with his statement, but not in the context of how he says it. I believe that a person’s intention is paramount. I believe I can kill someone with the pure intent of saving someone else or even myself. Not all killing is done in hate. Also, unfortunately, Mr. Sprinkle does not understand a violent attacker. Specifically, while I have not been involved in a fight for my life, I would say I am an authority on people who are coming down off drugs. I can tell you that I have seen men (and women), who are coming down off drugs, who it took eight full-grown adults to hold down in a therapeutic hold. Even with that number of people, it was still like riding a bucking bull. A person who is filled with adrenaline is a powerhouse! I’m sure we have all heard the stories of moms lifting cars off of infants when filled with adrenaline.

What Mr. Sprinkle doesn’t seem to understand, is that someone hyped on drugs or full of adrenaline is more than a match for a person who is scared. For that matter, most home break-ins aren’t done by single individuals, but by more than one person.

In this instance, it’s at least two against one. You must have an equalizer to have any chance at all. He argues that forcefully killing the attacker is an act of violence and he is right, but that violence is not evil, it is providing justice in love for evil here on earth. Christ always calls us to love first and I find that idea compelling and instructional. I like what César Chávez has said about it, “I am not a nonviolent man. I am a violent man who is trying to be nonviolent.” I also quite like Jordan Peterson when he says, “A harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very, very dangerous man who has that under voluntary control.” Violence in a fallen world is a necessity to live a Godly life. Being willing to soil your unbloodied hands and your own innocence is at times necessary to do what is right, to live a life that God has called you to.

I have always had a great amount of respect for C.S. Lewis and in reading Mere Christianity again, I find a nearly perfect quote from him about what it means for a Christian to take a life.

“Does loving your enemy mean not punishing him? No, for loving myself does not mean that I ought not to subject myself to punishment—even to death. If one had committed a murder, the right Christian thing to do would be to give yourself up to the police and be hanged. It is, therefore, in my opinion, perfectly right for a Christian judge to sentence a man to death or a Christian soldier to kill an enemy. I always have thought so, ever since I became a Christian, and long before the war, and I still think so now that we are at peace.” He is saying that taking a life for a justified reason, is not the same as murder, not in God’s eyes anyway and it certainly shouldn’t be in our eyes. I also find the idea that some who preach Christian pacifism or Christian non-violence seem to believe that if you believe otherwise, you are somehow not in line with Christ, or that you cant be saved if you believe this way. I find this to be a very dangerous way of thinking. You might believe I misunderstand a Biblical concept, which I certainly do believe if you preach Christian non-violence, but I do not believe you are not a Christian if you believe this. I believe you misunderstand a Biblical concept, but that this concept is not a salvific concept that much be understood right away. You can misunderstand this, and still be a follower of Christ. But to those who preach Christian non-violence though and say if you don’t agree you are not a follower of Christ… perhaps you should back off a step and remove the plank from your own eye.

So, in the end, I’m sorry Mr. Sprinkle, but I love my family, innocents, and the temple of the Holy Spirit (my own body), too much to allow evil to debase or destroy them. I choose love, not hate. Because you would truly have to hate someone to allow the evil of this world to act when you have been given the ability to stop that evil by an all-powerful and loving God. In fact, I believe you become evil in allowing it to continue.

Unpopular Ideas in My Circle

May 24, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I am often an odd duck. Often describing myself as a conservative Libertarian, I hold some different views about several different issues. Some of those beliefs may not be set in stone. Some of them might be contentious or even seen as wrong. However, just because I might think something should be legal or should be put into place, does not mean that I wish to partake in said thing, or that I believe said thing is morally right or not harmful in some way. So take everything I am going to say with a grain of salt and know that I am very flexible on these thoughts and that I could be convinced otherwise if someone were to offer a compelling argument to the opposing side. So let’s start with a bang!

Cannabis Should be Legalized:

This one is interesting. There are several reasons why I think this should be done. First off, the reasoning behind it being put as a Schedule 1 drug in the first place seems sketchy at best. The campaign to demonize it seems almost laughable these days when you look at the politically motivated movie Reefer Madness in 1936 and the political cartoons of the time as well.

However, while I will never use this substance, I also don’t think it should be criminalized. When we look at the psychological and physical effects of using this substance, we can see that these effects are not as severe as the effects of using too much alcohol. It is nearly impossible to overdose on this drug and while it is not safe to drive a car while on it, the same can be said for alcohol use. We allow alcohol in our country and some laws govern its legal use. I believe that similar laws could be enacted to govern cannabis. Do I believe that use in children/teens will increase? Yes. However, the net good of freeing up our police forces from drug-related enforcement efforts and the decrease of those incarcerated for purely drug-related offenses would be a good thing overall. Should there be consequences if people are say driving while intoxicated? Of course! Should there be consequences if people are using this drug around children and there is secondhand exposure? Yep. Should there be consequences for children and teens who are found using this substance underage? Yes.

I just don’t feel like we should not be incarcerating people for this.

All Drugs Should Be Decriminalized:

Now I don’t think that we should be selling the harder drugs or making them more available, but I don’t think that we should be criminalizing the use of these substances. Do I think this would harm society? Maybe. However, I don’t believe that criminalizing the use of a substance is the right way to combat the issue. Am I in favor of criminalizing selling these substances? Maybe. But for those people who are addicted and struggling, should we be criminalizing them? No. I think we should be trying to help these people to overcome their addictions in any way possible. I believe if we took the funding that we have been using for punishing and going after the people using these substances and put it towards rehabilitation programs and making those either affordable or even free to those struggling, we might be able to help those people get into recovery.

I Hope Multiverse Theory is Correct:

This is another odd duck of an idea. Recently scientists have been talking about Multiverse Theory. Even in popular movies like Dr. Strange and the Multiverse of Madness and Everything Everywhere All at Once and even in some more classic films like Donnie Darko we see this idea being played with and explored. Spiritually and honestly scientifically, I am okay with this idea. I like this idea quite a bit and I don’t think I am alone in liking it. C. S. Lewis in his classic The Chronicles of Narnia books explored this idea quite a bit. In The Magician’s Nephew the first book in the series chronologically we see Polly and Diggory heading into the Woods Between the Worlds and getting into a different dimension.

Now it should be noted that Polly and Diggory go into the other world known as Charn bringing about an age of terror in Narnia because they bring The White Witch to Narnia at its birth and therefore set up the evil that she does in that world, but still, I hope Multiverse Theory is correct. And let me tell you why I hope that.

I think that the idea that there are multiple worlds all ruled over by God is incredibly interesting to theorize about and play with. Writing Christian fantasy is bringing my mind into this world and helping me to believe that all things (even crazy world things) are possible with a God as infinite and imaginative as ours. I like to think that while we are of course the children of God, he would have no reason to tell us about the other worlds in which he has other children. So while our scriptures may be silent on the topic of other worlds (so far as I can tell), I like this idea and hope it’s true.

Universal Basic Income Might Help:

This is something that I might get some flak for. I think that a UBI might be a solution for the state of the Welfare System in our country (USA). Now let me do some explaining first. The US spends about 1.05 trillion dollars on the welfare system per year. That’s including state contributions. There are around 258.3 million adults in the US. If we take the total spending on welfare and then divide that by the number of adults, that gives each adult in the US a total amount of cash per year of $4,065.00 which doesn’t seem like much. If you divide that out over 12 months, it only accounts for $338.75 per month. It doesn’t seem like much does it?

That being said though if we eliminate all adults who make over $100,000 per year. That only leaves us with 37 million people. I think I would comfortably say that people who make over $100,000 per year do not need welfare. So if we take those 37 million people left who make under that amount we get a very different story. So if we take 1.05 trillion dollars and divide that among 37 million people that make under 100,000 dollars a year, then each adult gets $28,378.38 per year. That equals an extra $2,364.86 per month for all adults. If it’s you and your spouse? That’s an extra $4,729.73 per month or an extra $56,756.76 per year.

Now let’s look at this realistically, do people making $100,000 need that? No. If we were going to try to help with poverty, we could only look at those people making $50,000 or less. So that amount of cash would be even more if we looked at that. Now, these numbers are completely based on what we are currently spending on the entire welfare system in the US and Lord knows that I am not good at math. So my numbers could certainly be off. That being said, I am all for people being in charge of their own lives. I am all for people being responsible for their own well-being. I don’t believe the government knows best how to help my family; I think I do. I trust other people to know what’s best for their families as well.

I think that when people are given the freedom to help themselves in the way they see as best, they will overwhelmingly use those recourses much more effectively than the government can. Will some people misuse those resources? Of course, but that is happening now with our current system. So I would much rather encourage people to be more responsible than less responsible. In the long term, I think this type of policy would save the average taxpayer money. Cash in the pocket doesn’t need to increase its budget quite as often when special interest groups are vying for the money, but it’s just the American people. It would only need to increase when inflation increases (go figure that might be needed given the current state of things). Along with this, we could have a program where if we see that a person is unable to help themselves and we see a pervasive need for that person to have help in utilizing those funds, a directed agency would be able to help the person to direct those funds in a meaningful way, working towards allowing them full control in the future if possible.

All American Schools Should Have Firearm Training:

I believe that all American High Schools should teach senior men to shoot modern sporting riffles, how to clean them, maintain them, and properly shoot them. Along with that, they should all be taught proper safety and storage of them as well. Given what is happening in Ukraine with Russia invading there, men in the US should have a basic understanding of firearms, if the need should arise for them to help in the defense of their home and country. This leads me to my next point.

All Adults Should be Issued a Fully Automatic AR15:

I believe that all adult males who are of age and legal status should be issued a fully automatic AR15 along with ten 30-round magazines and a yearly allotment of 4,000 rounds of NATO ball ammunition. The right to bear arms is enshrined in our constitution and we should be supporting that right, both through free education for seniors in High School and also free training for the public at large.

According to factcheck.afp.com, “All Swiss men over the age of 18 undergo basic military training, after which they remain part of a national “militia” until they are around 30. They keep their unloaded service weapons at home during this time, and when their service has ended they have the choice of keeping their personal weapon, as long as they first acquire a permit. Women can also volunteer for national service.” Now, that is Switzerland of course, and not the US, but I think we can learn a thing or two from the Swiss. I think all US men over the age of 18 should be required to undergo military training. South Korea has a similar policy. I think it would also do a lot in helping some of our “man-child” issues. Might help some of these losers in their mother’s basement to grow up a bit.

Along with these types of training, we would of course be giving all these adult males psychological testing when they go to enter into military service. It would be at this point that we would be able to identify problematic psychological issues within the male population and be able to get those individuals the help they may need in dealing with those issues before they become violent or problematic within society as a whole.

Conclusion:

Are these ideas unpopular? Perhaps. Would I be willing to reconsider these ideas? Of course! However, for the moment, this is where I stand on these ideas. In the future, I think I could change my tune. Many of these ideas I think might be pipe dreams for the moment. However, I like to think about things like this. I believe that if we can’t talk about issues we will never grow. If we can’t throw out ideas to people who may not have thought of these ideas, then how can we ever make things better? I like talking about things that are off and odd. Please feel free to question, argue, or disparage any or all of these ideas in the comments below. I welcome the discourse. Thanks for reading.

D. Michl Lowe

Abortion Addressed

May 21, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe14 Comments

Abortion; it’s been in the news a lot here lately due to the court leaks and the supposed upcoming overturning of Roe v. Wade. It’s a highly controversial topic with strong opinions on both sides of the aisle, but really, it shouldn’t be. Now, it should be mentioned that I am a white, Christian, middle-class, straight man and have been told quite frequently that my opinion on the matter isn’t wanted, needed, or valued. And I have been told that I need to (in a direct quote) “Sit down and shut up!” and “No uterus, no opinion!”

However, it really shouldn’t be an issue to admit that abortion is a moral issue to many people and in the square of public debate, moral issues are and should be debated by all people, regardless of sex or any other difference. I am also a conservative Libertarian. So when it comes to personal rights or liberty, I am very stern in my thoughts about rights and the values put forth by many libertarian ideals. So with that in mind, I am going to be writing about abortion today.

There’s an app I have been really enjoying lately called Rumble Debate. It’s an app where they give you topics to discuss and then you can have a one-on-one debate with someone who disagrees about the selected topic. Then others can vote on who they believe won a completed debate. For a person like me (who loves a good debate) it’s a fantastically fun app. You might believe that it just descends into complete chaos 99% of the time, like nearly every other argument online, but I have mostly been pleasantly surprised at the civility of the debates I have had so far.

That being said, they recently opened a debate on whether or not you agree with the Supreme Court ruling on Roe and I have been very unimpressed with the arguments I have had from those who disagree with me and have found very few people who are willing to really have a true conversation with me about it. It’s rare that they even have answers to my points and questions. Most of the time, I have presented some of my points and they have just refused to address them. So let me share some of the thoughts about abortion I have gathered throughout the years and see what you think.

1. Abortion ends a human life:

It seems like this shouldn’t even be a point that needs to be made, but I am making it because so many don’t want to actually acknowledge this aspect. Let’s face the reality here, the entity within a woman has human DNA, is a male or female (though most of the time it’s in there), has human features (through the majority of the time it’s in there), and most certainly is alive. From nearly every standard we have, it is alive. So when an abortion happens, this ends a human life.

2. Lack of development is a terrible argument:

The issue with this idea that is often thrown around is that you can extend it to humans outside of the womb. I have often heard it said that because the entity is an embryo, fetus, zygote, etc; it is not ending a human life and is not murder or killing. This is a very weak argument because my son who is only two and a half is not fully developed. I should also mention that he is very expensive and often loud, so am I free to kill him?

He is not fully developed, so does that make it okay? I really hope you say no. Beyond that, the human brain technically doesn’t finish its development until around the age of 28 years, so many of you reading this aren’t fully developed either. Should your mommy or daddy have the right to kill you right now? I mean, technically you aren’t fully developed. You laugh, but it’s completely true.

3. Location is a bad argument:

I have heard said a lot that because the entity is within a woman’s body, she should have the right to get rid of (murder) said entity. However, my personal location does not rid me of my right to live. I recently took a trip to Virginia with the 4th graders of the school I work at. My right to be alive did not end when I passed into a new state.

It doesn’t end when I leave my house. It didn’t end when I took a trip to South Korea several years ago. This is a God-given right that doesn’t end when a person changes locations or is in a specific location. Neither should the human entity within a woman lose its God-given right to life just because of its location within a womb.

4. Dependency is a poor argument:

This is one of the most popular arguments that pro-choice advocates like to make. Because the entity is dependent on the woman for survival, ending that dependency is neither murder nor ending a human life because that life was dependent on another human for its survival. However, that’s a very poor argument because once again, we can extend it beyond the womb.

Let’s take my son again, just a year or so ago, my son was breastfeeding from my wife (which is one of the most amazing things God ever came up with), and I would argue that he was (and still is) completely dependent on her for his survival. Without her body (literally) he would have died. He had to have her to live.

But even without the milk side of things, many people require others for survival. I had friends who had severely mentally handicapped children who completely depend on others for their survival and will for the entirety of their lives. Can we kill these people? They depend on other human bodies to live. I hope you would say no.

5. Consciousness or awareness are flawed arguments:

I haven’t heard this argument made as much, but if you dig long enough with someone, this one might come up. Either way though, it’s a poor excuse for murder. You will hear the pro-choice side say that because the entity is not conscious, or is not aware, it is not murder to remove and kill said entity. It’s a terrible argument because there are many people who don’t have a consciousness or awareness.

Fully grown adults who are in a coma don’t have consciousness or awareness during that time. They still retain a right to life. You can’t just go through and stab people who are in a coma. That’s still murder. Beyond that, everyone sleeps and quite frankly, you are neither conscious nor aware while you are asleep. Should it be fine to stab you while you sleep? I thought not.

6. The Rape/Incest argument does work:

If a person is raped or there is an incestual pregnancy the pro-choice folks will often call the pro-life people monsters for suggesting that the woman be “forced” to carry the child to term, saying that it re-traumatizes the woman over and over again. I’m not going to say that it wouldn’t re-traumatize a woman to carry the child to term. However, saving her from further trauma is not a free license to end the life within her.

If we understand that the entity within a woman is a living human life, then ending her life is morally wrong regardless of the trauma its allowance to live brings others. It continues to have the right to live. The man who committed this evil upon a woman does not and should not give license to murder an innocent child. That child should not be punished for the evil their father committed.

That evil lasts, long after the actual act is done. That evil may even be lasting into the birth of a child that came from that original evil. It’s a terrible thing, but awful things happen in life. All we can do is love and support the woman through the pregnancy and birth of the child. All these pregnancies should be automatically put up for free adoption right after birth unless the woman wants the child.

Closing argument:

I understand why the pro-choice folks are passionate about this. I’m convinced most of them have the best intentions. They want women to be able to lead productive and happy lives and an unexpected child can certainly impact that. However, no one’s life or quality of life should supersede another’s life or quality of life. People have equal rights. All peoples have a right to live, including those entities within a womb.

D. Michl Lowe

Striking Out in Fatherhood

May 20, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

The other day I saw a comment from one of my buddies from college about his kid playing a sport. He was talking about trying to encourage his kid in the sport she was playing and how that is often difficult. I shared with him an experience I had with my own daughter Ellianna and how I as her dad have tried to encourage her. I think I would like to share it with you all as well, not to toot my own horn, but to hopefully encourage other parents to follow suit.

So Ellie started playing softball last year. She did extremely well that year. It was coach pitch and she was blasting those balls every other pitch it seemed like. She’s always been a speedy kid and is as competitive as they come, the complete opposite of me. When I was a kid, I played t-ball and I think my coach just decided that if he placed me far enough in the outfield, he could forget I was on the team and just play the game down a man. Which, honestly was most likely for the best since I was more interested in chasing butterflies in the outfield than playing the actual game. Ellie however is serious about this stuff and is almost always on point with her head in the game.

Anyway, this year they started doing “kid pitch”. While most of the games are just a revolving door of kids getting walked because of ball pitches, occasionally the kids will just swing and basically get themselves out by swinging at pitches that would never have been a strike. That being said, during one of our games this year Ellie came off the field in tears after being struck out. She told me later that she was upset because she hadn’t gotten a hit in two games.

I found her behind the dugout crying with two of her teammates attempting to comfort her (good teammates). I went up to her and while hugging her, I whispered this into her ear, “Darlin, if you never hit another ball in your life, I would still be bursting with pride for you. I am proud of you and I love you! I love watching you play your games and I am excited every time you are playing. As long as you are having fun out there, you have fulfilled every expectation I have ever had for you in sports.”

Now, to be fair, she continued to cry and be upset. She has very high standards for herself. However, I always want her to know that her winning or losing at something doesn’t affect my feelings or thoughts about her. She is my daughter and I am proud of her just because she is mine.

I remember one game we were at, I was standing by the fence watching the game, and a man was standing next to me. Apparently, his daughter was at the third base, covering it. He started growling at her, “Hey (kids name), you better catch that ball if it comes to you! Do you hear me? You have to make up for that last inning and you messing up like you did! Don’t embarrass me like that again! You hear me?” I had to bite my tongue. I was ready to let that dad know what type of dad I thought he was being. Maybe I should have, but I will tell you that I vowed even then that I would never be like that man. That’s not who God has called me to be.

D. Michl Lowe

When I Die, Freeze Me And Pound Me In The Ground

May 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

My mother used to say, “When I die, just freeze me and pound me in the ground.” This is a great saying and honestly made me really think about what I wanted to be done when I died. Maybe that’s a morbid thing to talk about or think about, but honestly, it’s never been that big of a deal to me. My death is not the end of me. I know where I’m going and while I might not know all the details of what is going to happen, I am ready for it should it come soon. I do not fear death.

So I have been thinking about it for a long time now and I have realized that I am unlike many of my fellow West Virginians. The people of West Virginia value funerals… a lot. It is a big deal here. I however do not. While I understand why these rituals are valued, I myself do not value them at all. Well, let me step that back for a second. There is value to me, in that I see that they help people I care about go through the grieving process. That is valuable to me, but me personally, no.

I believe when I die, if my wife and children are still around (I hope), then I don’t want a funeral. I suppose that if the kids need something then that is fine, but honestly, I hope they don’t spend much money on it. If anything is needed to be done, then just have a picture of me up front at the church and have the pastor preach a short sermon. Then maybe people could bring some pot luck so people could eat and share memories of me, that would be great.

I have seen the bills that funerals leave behind. I don’t want to saddle my family with anything like that when I pass on. I don’t need a fancy coffin. I don’t need a new suit to wear. I don’t need formaldehyde in me to preserve me. In fact, I don’t need anything done to the body besides to get rid of it. That’s not me any longer. I am not in there. Who I am is no longer present with that husk. I am somewhere else, with someone else.

I understand that grief is a part of losing someone. I am okay with the grief, but it has nothing to do with my body. I have spent a little time looking into how to donate your body to science, but it seems like it is a more complicated idea than I first thought. It’s not like being an organ donor, where you just check the box and it’s taken care of. There’s a little more to it apparently. I need to spend some more time investigating it. I would rather allow my body to help future doctors learn than to make it all “pretty” so people can gawk at my body and say things like, “He looks so natural.” Yeah, I’m a fan of that.

Death, for me, is not a loss. Sure I don’t want to have it happen any time soon, there’s still a lot left to do on this plane, but neither do I shy away from it. I’m not worried about it. When I was younger, there was certainly some existential dread going on, but I think that was because I felt like there was still so much left to do. Much of those desires have been fulfilled for me. Let’s look at some of those, I got to marry the love of my life, and our life together has been fantastic so far and as much as I can tell, it will be for the future as well. I have three amazing kids who are already turning out fantastic. Now of course there’s a lot left to do with them, but they are here and will continue to be as fantastic as they are now, I have no doubt. I guess in the end, as my Momma said, “Just freeze me and pound me in the ground.”

D. Michl Lowe

How To Get Into Heaven Without Becoming A Christian

April 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe3 Comments

In 2001, I was in college at MVNU. We had to take a “Christian Beliefs” course. This was part of the liberal arts education that was a part of all bachelor’s degrees from this institution, regardless of actual major. Looking back on my education, I can’t say that I am thrilled to have spent so much time (and money) on classes that ultimately didn’t enhance my understanding of Psychology (my actual degree), but I can say that I enjoyed these extra classes immensely and feel as though they have enhanced my person greatly.

Anyway, while in this class Dr. Sanders challenged us to write a paper detailing a way to get into Heaven without going through Jesus or a traditional understanding of salvation through grace. We were to present our papers in front of the class and then take questions and discussion after presenting them. I recall many people in my class standing up and talking about Buddhism’s enlightenment or how to seek nirvana and even some discussion about the Muslim faith. I remember being slightly confused, did these people really think these were legitimate ways to enter into Heaven?

I have never been someone to keep the boat from rocking. In fact, I have been the one to jump from side to side, just to see who falls out and how much they scream. That might seem cruel, but honestly, I would rather question everything and be certain than just go along and follow fools. Just know that if I argue with you about your thoughts and keep coming back to do it again, it’s because I value your tenacity and spirit, even if I disagree with you. So, I stood up to take my turn in trying to defend a way to get into Heaven without Jesus. Now, I’m going, to be honest, I haven’t torn through my files from 2001 to find that same paper that I wrote. I’m sure it was very basic and not well-spoken, let’s be honest though, I haven’t matured that much since then and my writing has most likely gone downhill without the constant critique of learned professors. However, I remember my main points and will detail my arguments for you.

So, without further ado, here are 3 ways to get into Heaven, without becoming a Christian.

1. Ignorance:

Let us start with an easy one. When Jesus died on the cross, this was the start of Christianity proper. We could argue that the coming of Jesus’ ministry was the start of it, but without a doubt, we can say for sure that after he died, was resurrected, and then ascended into Heaven, from that point on Christianity was the way to get into Heaven. However, there’s a problem with this idea. The spread of Christianity was limited by the speed at which early missionaries could travel and convert.

The problem here should be apparent; people died before the truth of the gospel could reach them. This was after Christ’s death, but before they were able to have any knowledge at all about what had happened, or what they would need to know about Christianity in order to repent and be saved or even baptized. Because of this, there are a group of people who never had the information needed to be saved, but lived after the death of Christ and should therefore be held to the standard of needing Christ’s blood to be saved from their sin. I often think about native American peoples over in the Americas before Europeans came in and began to spread the gospel to them. If they were to die before the message of Christ came to North America, does that mean that they would automatically go to Hell because they hadn’t accepted Christ?

I honestly doubt that is what a loving God would do. To me, when I think about how those people or anyone who has never had the opportunity to learn about Jesus before face judgment at the end of time, I think God has a different standard by which he judges these peoples. In Romans 2:14–16, it says, “Gentiles don’t have the Law. But when they instinctively do what the Law requires they are a Law in themselves, though they don’t have the Law. They show the proof of the Law written on their hearts, and their consciences affirm it. Their conflicting thoughts will accuse them, or even make a defense for them, on the day when, according to my gospel, God will judge the hidden truth about human beings through Christ Jesus.” So, we can see that even if a person does not have the “law”, the ideas of what is good and bad are written on their hearts. It’s in their mind. We all have a conscience and because of that understand basic rules of what is right and wrong. God is able to know all things; He will judge the person based on what they know and how they followed their understanding of what is right and wrong.

So, does this mean that we should never have started the great commission? No, of course not. Jesus, Himself said we should be spreading His words into all the world in Mark 16:15. So we are called to bring people out of ignorance. We aren’t meant to live in ignorance. No, we are called to a higher state of awareness. However, do I believe that when I get to Heaven, there might be some Native Americans there who never heard about Jesus, but followed the law written on their hearts? I believe that is possible.

2. Innocence:

I think this argument is one that most people would be willing to make. If a person is innocent, then they should not be held to the same standard as people who have lost their innocence. With the holocaust of abortion going on in our country these days, I have a very hard time believing that God would condemn those millions murdered by abortion to an afterlife in Hell. These are a group of people that would include the unborn, the just born, babies, young children, and perhaps even pre-teens. I would also include the intellectually disabled in this group as well. I might also include those peoples who are plagued by severe mental illness as well.

These are folks who do not yet have or will never attain the mental faculties to understand the offer of salvation through grace by Jesus Christ. There are of course degrees of disability or development that might make some people able to understand to differing degrees. In Romans 1:2 Paul states, “Since the creation of the world, God’s invisible qualities — his eternal power and divine nature — have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” However, we know that the unborn, babies, some children, and even some pre-teens, often do not have the ability to “clearly see” God’s eternal power and divine nature. So I would conclude, that because some of them do not, or cannot “clearly see”, they have an excuse.

While I would not say that all people in this category get a free pass to Heaven (although I would think all aborted children and most young children) I would say that I believe that most do. However, God is of course able to accurately judge a person’s soul completely, so His ability far outweighs our own ability to make this kind of judgment. This is an important thing to look at and think about. I know many variations of Christianity talk about the idea of the “age of accountability”. This is basically what I’m talking about. Again, I’m not saying that all these people will be in heaven, but that I won’t be surprised when/if I see them there upon my arrival.

3. Soul Placement:

This last idea is not going to be popular and I’m not sure I agree with it myself. I say that because I’m not sure it doesn’t border on heresy. My assumption in this idea of how to get to Heaven without becoming a Christian is that God himself decides where to place souls. In Jeremiah 1:5 we see God saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” Basically, God is talking about His foreknowledge here. I don’t believe this is Him talking about knowing a person beforehand like they existed before. However, because of this passage, we know that God knows the choices a person will make in their life. He knows before making them, whether or not they will fail in accepting His love and ultimately His forgiveness of sins.

So, with that in mind, God makes a choice of where to place our souls. He made a choice to place my soul within the growing child that was inside my Christian mother’s belly. Which was also a part of Christian marriage, in a Christian home, in a mostly Christian town, in a mostly Christian country, in a time where Christianity was largely free to be practiced without governmental or even individual interference. My statistical chances of becoming Christian were pretty good. Actually, according to Pew Research, I had an 80% chance of continuing to identify as protestant if both my parents were also protestant.

That’s really good odds. My question is, does God take His own decision, as to where He places a soul, into account when judging souls for eternity? I think he does. I verbalized my thoughts in this way back in college. Let’s pretend a man was born in a remote village deep in the heart of a remote area of the world that holds to a non-Christian-minded religious way of thinking. Let’s pretend that this man grows up very sheltered and eventually becomes the leader of this non-Christian religion in his town. Nearing his death, a Christian missionary comes to the town and begins converting some of the people. This missionary goes to the leader of this non-Christian religion and basically ends up telling him that everything he has been raised to believe, lived his life believing, and dedicated his life to honoring and upholding has been a lie. What are the chances this man will convert? Not very good. Statistically, not nearly as good as what I had.

I merely argue that God takes His own choices of where to place souls into account when passing judgment. I’m not saying the hypothetical man in that scenario will go to Heaven. Not at all. What I am merely saying is that I think God takes all aspects of His creation into account when passing judgment on the souls He has created. Obviously, this is not an argument that everyone gets to Heaven. Not in any way am I suggesting that is the case. I am merely saying that God is a merciful God. Something we already know to be true. We know He loves us, all of us. Those of us who choose to accept His gracious gift, and even those who choose to reject it. However, without Christ, how are we to know for sure we have eternal life? I don’t believe we can know that for sure without the blood of Jesus covering us.

Afterthoughts:

Do these three ways to enter Heaven even matter? Most of those who these methods affect, will either never know about it until they experience it in the afterlife, or were never aware they had missed it, or are too lost in the mire of where God placed them that they are truly lost to His truth. I think that knowing this and thinking about this helps us who it doesn’t affect. I believe that thinking about how God’s mercy and understanding affect those of us who might not have gotten the same opportunities as some others help us. Some of us are more privileged in our Christianity than we might have realized. I know I am.

Also, I think about the millions upon millions of children sacrificed on the altar of self in the name of abortion. The blood of these children cries out to us and so often we look the other way. I find comfort in the idea that I believe they now reside with their Heavenly Father. It’s unfair and barbaric, but at least there is that small silver lining. On the idea of the innocent, I think this is an idea we all want to be true. No one wants to believe that a child lost from the womb or one lost at a very young age is lost for all eternity.

I find it hard to believe that God would allow such a thing. I think the Bible upholds God’s view that children and I would say even the “child-like” are what the kingdom of God is made of. Mark 10:15 even states that people who don’t “receive the Kingdom of God “like a little child will never enter it.”, giving us the idea that Children have already received it because of their innocence. I know this post is out there. There is a lot to argue over with these ideas. I’m open to nearly all discussions about this topic. Having not fully made up my own mind about these ideas, I put them out there for critique and argument.

So in the end, I believe that really, there is no way to enter into Heaven WITHOUT Jesus. It is only because He is who He is that through His mercy and love we can start to unravel the idea that a traditional and even Biblical understanding of salvation may not be the ONLY way to which some select peoples enter Heaven.

D. Michl Lowe

The Four Qualities Of An Accountability Partner

April 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I paced back and forth in the library of our home with the phone pressed to my ear. On the other end, a friend of mine was going through one of the most traumatic times in his life. This was about the fourth time this week that I had been on the phone for over an hour with this guy. We both cried and often there was yelling. It’s an odd thing though, thinking back on this time now, I find it to be one of the best times I have spent with this friend. It wasn’t a good time, but it was a meaningful time. I am closer to my friend now because of that time spent on the phone. He and I truly are accountability partners. An accountability partner has several distinct qualifications that should be noted. Below I have laid out four of these qualifications that I have come to understand.

They are NOT your opposite gender:
- It won’t do to have you in a relationship like this and get distracted by sexually or romantically charged thoughts. This relationship is different. This is why your spouse should not be your accountability partner, as wonderful as I’m sure they are. There is also the point that the level of intimacy expected from this form of relationship should not be with someone to who you are genetically predisposed to be attracted. If you are married, this would be especially a bad thing, since it can lead to infidelity. If you are not married, you will just get distracted and the whole purpose of being accountable to this person is lost.
Friendship is not the main goal:
- That sounds odd, doesn’t it? However, it is true. In an accountability friendship, friendship is not the main goal or purpose. It will most likely be a result of this relationship, but at the outset, it isn’t the reason you have it. The main goal here is accountability. This means that oftentimes, you will have to tell this person (or they will have to tell you) things you may not want to hear. Telling your friend that going to the movies with his female friend who is not his wife is a bad idea, could be met with some hostility. It’s not what he wants to hear. However, he needs to hear it. Your goal in this form of relationship is to hold the other person to a Biblical standard of living. Their goal is to do the same for you.
You are to be Christ for this person:
- Jesus traveled with 12 other men. Throughout the scriptures we see Him teaching them and often, rebuking them. At one point, He even calls one of them “Satan”. That’s some rough language there, but why did He do it? To mold them further towards Himself. In 1 Corinthians 4:14–17 we see the Apostle Paul saying, “When he had ascended into Heaven, we see the disciples themselves doing this same thing. The bonds they form with each other are important. They act as Christ for each other. I am writing you this not to shame you, but to admonish you as my beloved children. Even if you should have countless guides to Christ, yet you do not have many fathers, for I became your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel. Therefore, I urge you, to be imitators of me. For this reason, I am sending you Timothy, who is my beloved and faithful son in the Lord; he will remind you of my ways in Christ [Jesus], just as I teach them everywhere in every church.” Notice he says he isn’t trying to shame them, but to admonish or warn them. Then he says to imitate him as he imitates Christ Jesus. He also says he is going to send Timothy to help them as well. Not hard to see this idea of an accountability partner being played out in the early church.
It is not just the two of you:
- This relationship is meant to be a threefold relationship. You, the other person, and Jesus. Just as we might talk about marriage being threefold (You, your spouse, and God), the accountability partner relationship also includes God. This means that throughout the relationship, you should be in communion with Christ. Praying for the other person and asking God to lead you as you work to lead them is paramount. They will be doing the same. In this way, both of you rebuff each other to create a communal relationship that works to enhance and strengthen the whole community of God around these two who are in this form of relationship.

These aren’t meant to be an exhaustive list. They are meant to be a guide that can help you when talking with your accountability partner. What does that relationship look like? Does this relationship lead you both closer to Christ? I think within context, all of our life should be asking that question. Does this lead me closer to Christ?

D. Michl Lowe

The Christians Have Failed

April 12, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

Christians have failed. I speak to you now as one of them, the failures. All “Christians” are not Christians. It was the pagans at Antiauk that first called the apostles “Christians” (Acts 11:26; 26:28). They used it derogatorily because the apostles didn’t follow the religious and philosophical thoughts of the pagans.

Christians have failed. We are often still despised by the world, but honestly, not enough. If we truly believed, the disapproval would know no end. I say if we truly believed… and I mean that. IF we truly believed. Because I’m not convinced many of us do; believe I mean. We say we do, but often, I question that belief we claim.

Belief without a changed life is not belief in the truth of what you are claiming, but belief in the benefits of believing. I can sit in church on Sunday morning and say I am a good person for doing so. I can shake my head when the Pastor condemns sin and feel high and mighty for not going down that road in my own life, but when I am full of my own piety, where does that leave me?

We are often truly arrogant.

There’s a Zen teaching that says, “Look at everything with a beginner’s mind.” We, as Christians, have to continually empty our cups so that Christ can fill them with himself. We are so very good at filling ourselves… of filling our lives with nonsense, pride, selfishness, and patronization. So what does it mean to be a Christian? What should I expect from Christians? There was a man who asked Jesus a similar question, he said, what must I do to get eternal life? Jesus asked the man to tell him what the law said,

“He (the man) answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.” Luke 10:27

And Jesus basically says that this is exactly right. Now I don’t agree with everything he says, but Creflo A. Dollar said,

“In order to love God, you must first renew your mind where love is concerned. When many people think of love, they think of human, emotional love, which is basically selfish because it has conditions—it loves when the conditions are right, or when it feels like loving. This is the type of love many people demonstrate toward God. However, God is not interested in you loving Him with your feelings. When we choose what we want or desire over God’s Word, we demonstrate that we love ourselves more than God. We must get rid of our own selfish desires and replace them with the desires God has placed in our hearts. When we love God, we will submit to His plan and purpose for our lives.”

According to Romans 5:5, the Holy Spirit has poured the love of God in our hearts, and that love gives us the ability to love with a Godkind of love, an unselfish love. God’s love is unconditional. Unlike selfish, human love, God’s love puts the needs of others above its own. This is the love God wants Christians to demonstrate.

Every day, you have to make a decision to allow the “you” inside to die and the (unselfish) God Love to live.

That means in order for the love of God to be evident in your life, you have to make a quality decision to allow your thoughts, desires, emotions, and feelings, that oppose the Word of God, to die daily. It is impossible to love God, or others, when you have plans, purposes, and desires that are contrary to the Word of God. How often have you seen Christians who continue to live for themselves? How often have you seen the hypocrisy in one of them? How often have you looked at their lives and thought, “dang, I am a better person than them.”

The interesting part about your thoughts on them… is that you are right. They aren’t any better than you. They aren’t any better, or moral, or anything else. The only real difference between them and you is that they have given their lives over to Christ and are attempting to allow him to lead their lives.

I say attempting because that’s exactly what it is, attempting. Time and again they struggle to live according to his will in their lives and time and again they fail. They fail, and fail, and fail, and fail, and fail. They cry out to him for his help. They say in church and in songs that they believe, but secretly when they are alone in their rooms at night, they pray for God to help them with their unbelief.

I’ve said it before, Christianity is the fantastic fantasy that we as adults are allowed to keep believing in beyond childhood. The Bible tells this beyond belief tale of resurrection from the dead and heaven and entities of evil that angels fight against and we are allowed and privileged to continue believing in.

We have never told Kat (my daughter) that Santa Claus was real. When she would ask about it, we tell her he was a man who lived a long time ago who gave children presents and they called him Saint Nicholas and that he is who all the people we see around Christmas are dressed up like. However, she continues to believe in Santa because she WANTS to believe, regardless of what anyone says. Christians want to believe and because of the truths they see in their own lives, the truth they have seen revealed in scripture, they have the benefit of belief, even if sometimes it’s hard to believe.

I know the truth of the Bible. Sometimes it’s hard to believe. Sometimes it’s hard to live even with all the personal evidence I’ve seen in my life, but I choose to continue my belief because I know it’s the truth.

D. Michl Lowe

The Death Of The Self

April 12, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I think I understand why we cling to who we are. We believe we are good. There is this incessant snare of self-aggrandizement that we are pulled into believing from a young age. Disney and our school counselors have beat the drums of self-esteem so long and so loud that it’s difficult to hear anything other than our dreams and awesome sense of amazement at who we are. “Follow your dreams!” they croon. You are a special and unique flower whose feelings and thoughts are valid. While I don’t believe that we should be looking for depression, or looking to be self-deprecating at all, there is a sense that without a realistic vision of who we are in this world, we can never truly grow. The real danger here is that woven into all this flowery talk is a hidden message; “you are never wrong”.

It is this message that creates in us a sense of acceptableness. That who we are (no matter what) is okay and right. There is no need to change if who you are is already fine. For that matter, if who you are is fine and good, what need is there for a savior? None of us is truly good. Romans 3:23 tells us that, “…all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” But very few of us believe that. My local pastor, Kent Estep said a while back in one of his sermons that we often replace the word “sin” with the word “mistake” and doing that should be seen as a big mistake. When you make a mistake, it’s no big deal. It’s just something you slightly think about so that you don’t make that mistake again, but hey, if you do then no big deal.

However, if we start to understand the gravity of our sinful nature, we can start to unravel our own need for Jesus and his forgiveness. When all you have are “mistakes” you do not need to be saved from your “sins”. The gravity of our situation is that we have convinced ourselves that we do not need to be saved. It’s like swimming with sharks with an open and bleeding gash on our foot. You might be fine with that cut on your foot, but the reality of your situation will soon come up to bite you. Let’s get to the heart of the matter, none of us are okay. None of us are good. Even if we would like to be, we aren’t. We are all flawed. We are all sinful. We are all in need of Jesus. The reality is that Adam’s sin falls heavily upon us all. Humanity is desperately in need of saving. We have to open our eyes to that reality and start to understand that for us to survive, we have to start losing our natural selves and taking on the mantle of Jesus for others.

So, what does that mean? What does it mean to “take up your cross” and follow after Jesus? I believe that a large part of this has to do with how we view who we are, what it means to be human, and where our priorities lie. When we start to understand who we are, we can begin to live according to a new set of rules and ideas. So, let’s begin talking about that. What does it mean to be alive here on earth? Who are you as a human being? I’ve argued with people about purpose. People were created by God for His pleasure and His glory. God didn’t need to create people. He was whole and complete within Himself. In Acts 17:24-25 we see it says,^“The God who made the world and everything in it, he who is Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in shrines made by human hands, nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything since he himself gives to all mortals life and breath and all things.” The bold text reveals to us His needs; nothing. However, he chose to make us anyway.

In Isaiah 43:7 we see God saying, “everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.” Again, the bold text gives us insight into why God created us; for His glory. Not that he needed that glory, but that by doing so, He would exalt Himself. This speaks directly to our purpose here on earth, above all else. We are meant to bring God glory. Our priority here on earth above all else is to Glorify God. If nothing else, understanding that purpose can point us in the right direction. However, there is more to unpack in this idea that just this overarching idea. What does it mean to glorify God?

The Apostle Paul offers us one of the best ways to look at this idea of dying to self and glorifying God. He observes that no amount of sin can overcome God’s grace. That as sin increases, God’s grace will always be more powerful and overcome it. So, he makes the logical leap to ask if we should continue sinning so that grace will continue to get more powerful. Of course, he says no way. So, Paul lays it out for us in a way that is very easy to comprehend, but hard to live.

What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life. For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly also be united with him in a resurrection like his. For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin – because anyone who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. The death he died, he died to sin once and for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore, do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness. For sin, shall no longer be your master, because you are not under the law, but under grace. – Romans 6:1-14

At the start of things, Paul argues that just because God’s grace will always be able to cover whatever multitude of sins we may have, it doesn’t mean we should continue to sin just to see God’s grace increase to cover it. Then he hits hard! He says that because we are now dead to our sinful nature if that is truly what has happened, how could we ever live in sin again? We are brought back to life as a new creation, something wholly different and wholly alien. Christ is no longer this unknown entity, but we have become Him for the world. He says not to be a tool for the devil because you have become a tool in the hands of God. You aren’t in charge of your motives or life. You aren’t the master any longer. Jesus is the master of your life, heart, mind, body, and spirit. Your desires are no longer your own. Your purpose is no longer your own. You are a slave to the righteousness that Christ has embedded within you.

Something to consider, this isn’t a mindset that will come about in a single sitting. It isn’t something you should expect from someone who is a new Christian. The path down this road is an ongoing surrender of self. We might call it a slow and painful death. It’s the bleeding out of your own identity.

D. Michl Lowe

The Problem Of Sin

April 12, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

How are we as Christians supposed to understand the idea of sin? How should we talk about sin to the non-believers? These are tough questions! Let’s start with a simple question; how do I know something is wrong? The way a Christian should understand sin is by looking to God’s Holy Scripture. Through reading God’s Word, we have a direct link into the mind of God and what He thinks is essential for us to know. Yet, some things aren’t mentioned in scripture. But, you can use logic and reason to begin to understand the mind and nature of God. Through the tool of reason, we have divine wisdom in the areas that He was silent in. So, let’s talk about sin and how it manifests in our lives.

First off, what is sin?

Sin is the direct willful turning from God’s known will, direction, or the law. It’s not your actions that are the sin, it’s the decision to turn away from God; to go your own way. This is why no one sin is greater than any other. I turn from God and then I do something. The sin is not the action, but the decision before the action. The action is the result of the decision to turn away. All sin is abhorrent in the eyes of God. Because all sin is the same, we can understand that God is the ultimate decider of what is “wrong” or what “sin” is. In Romans 3:23, we read “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” We all require divine grace.

Without God, there is no sin. There is no such thing as evil.

If there is no God, then there is nothing I can do that is wrong. Let’s pretend that God does not exist and everything has been a lie. Would it be wrong for me to steal a candy bar from the supermarket? Nope, if I can get away with it, it’s not wrong. There is no basis for you (my accuser) to say that what I have done is bad or wrong beyond your own opinion or that of others. If you don’t believe that God is the ultimate truth and decider of the moral law, then you have created a moral system for yourself.

You believe that the state is the ultimate authority or the government. However, laws can be changed. If a rich person decided to throw all their money into legalizing sex with little kids, they could get that sort of thing passed into law. But, does that make it right and okay to do that? I would argue no, but under a system where government or the state makes up what is moral and immoral, then it becomes right and okay. The same could be said for people who decide for themselves if what they are doing is right or wrong. Personal beliefs of right and wrong that are not based on Biblical truth are opinions, and everyone has those. Without God’s moral foundation, all opinions are equal.

Now, some of our decisions have to be based on our knowledge of God’s nature. Ultimately though, we believe that God will lead us in a direction through prayer, the study of His Word, and conversation with other believers into knowing his correct direction for us. None of these assumptions can contradict God’s Word or His known nature. For example, I don’t believe God would have it in His will for your life for you to murder your whole family and then use their bodies as shields to defend yourself from the law as you run naked down the street. That’s not in His will and it would go against the known law of God and His nature. However, if a person decides that their feelings and thoughts are the ultimate forms of truth, then there is nothing stopping them from making decisions and creating any form of moralistic code they want. They become a god within their mind.

If their morals dictate that murdering their family and running down the street naked while using those bodies as shields is right… who am I to say they are wrong? Their opinion is as valid as mine. That is if there is no higher power that is greater than our moral code. It should be obvious, that all ideas are not equal. Not everyone can be right. Someone has to be wrong. You will hear it said that all paths lead to “god”. No, they don’t… they don’t. You can’t believe that unicorns and fairies save your soul and still get into Heaven. It doesn’t work that way. There has to be a greater form of truth. There has to be a higher power, other than your own will and selfish thoughts. Without God to lead us, we are lost in our own will.

In Genesis 3:8, we see the first people on Earth starting to understand the gravity of sin. They hid from God and were frightened. Sin causes us to move away from God, it damages the relationship we were created to have with him. Because of our failure as humanity, we are forever in need of Christ’s grace in our lives. From our moment of life, we are depraved and lacking in purity. Our very nature is sin and selfishness.

We continue to see the issue of sin play out in the Old Testament and the Israelites. Time and again the Israelites fail. Sin is ever-present. Then Christ comes on the scene and the story changes. All of a sudden the world is flipped on its head. The religious leaders of the day are taken to task and redirected (sometimes very harshly). God has come down as a man and the world wasn’t ready. The people didn’t know what to do with him. So, they killed him. Their solution to the upset of their selfish lives was to once again sin; to murder God.

It’s almost comical at times to see how easy it is for humans to turn to sin to solve their problems. It would be funny, but we are talking about people’s souls, so there’s nothing funny about it. A man finds himself lonely and needs love. So, he doesn’t cultivate his relationships or seek the company of fellow believers. He instead searches the internet for a cheap and baseless pleasure in pornography. A woman finds herself pregnant when she hadn’t planned on it. So, she doesn’t endure the hardship of pregnancy and then gives the gift of a child to a barren couple. Instead, she chooses legal murder for the sake of convenience and self. There is a reason the road to Hell is wide. Sin gives the easy answer to life’s issues and promises pleasure and a “better life” in exchange for God’s plan.

When I was a kid, I kept questioning why Jesus had to die. Wasn’t there another way? Couldn’t Jesus have come down and forced everyone to believe? Wouldn’t that have been better? Why not stay here on Earth for the rest of eternity? Become a physical king and rule over everyone, decreeing laws and edicts so that everyone would know exactly what God wanted. The idea was so simple in my mind.

It was also not how God chose to solve the issue of human sin. That broken relationship had to be mended by the sacrificial death of a God, no amount of animal or human blood would be able to cover the sin of all of humanity. It might stem the tide for a time (as it did with the Old Testament sacrifices), but that system was just a stop-gap. A temporary solution to what was a permanent problem in humans. People, because of the choice made in the Garden, are forever under the veil of a sinful nature. We are destined to be corrupted for all time… or are we?

Of course, believing in Christ; acting on that belief, and turning from our sin will save our souls from eternal damnation. This is the simplistic idea of what it means to be a Christian. One can do this with a repentant heart on their death bed and still enter God’s Kingdom, but is that all there is? Is that the end of the commitment? Does the journey end there? Did Jesus come for anything else? Perhaps there is more to the story than a single moment in one’s life that “saves” a person.

When Christ came, he changed the game. It wasn’t about the rules anymore. It was getting to the heart of what it means to be human. It was understanding that God’s kingdom was here on Earth, now! It was looking into the heart of God and its foundation of love. God wasn’t out to punish sinners; he was out to redeem humanity and create a people wholly devoted to His vision. A people that grow in relationship with him. It’s no longer about me, it’s about Him.

In Mathew 27:51, we see the moment right as Jesus dies and what happens in the city. The veil to the Holy of Holies is torn. The very physical barrier separating God and man was torn in two by God Himself. This symbolic gesture is more meaningful than it at first appears. Up until this time, only a select few can speak directly with God. He was wholly separate and distant. Then he decided to come down here to Earth and change the way we interacted with God. He was here, present, and you were able to touch Him! A physical being with all the humanity we have. He came down into all the mess, all the dirt, and all the drama of what it means to be human.

The singular event of the sacrifice of a God warps human life into a possibility of salvation. While we are still corrupt, evil, vile, and putrid; God decided to die for us. This is the lynchpin in God’s plan for getting things to be put right. Without God’s decision to be selfless, we would have been lost forever. This is an interesting way to demonstrate His nature to us. He calls us to be selfless and to put others before us, just as he put us before Himself. God raised the nastiness of humanity above himself so that they might be redeemed and saved. That’s how much He cared for humanity.

D. Michl Lowe

The Wayward Uncle

April 8, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

We had taken a trip to the Smokey Mountains with mom and dad. Our idea of fun on these sorts of trips is shopping at the outlet stores, walking around the specialty shops, going to the aquarium, and most of all; eating at the restaurants. Every time we go through, we always eat at the Apple Barn at least one morning. During this trip, Uncle Ron had called mom and asked her if we could meet with him while on our trip since he doesn’t live far from this area.

At first, she balked at the idea, but he pushed her and said, “You all are going to eat at Apple Barn, right? Well, let me pay for your meal and eat with you.” How could she refuse, a free meal, and without a rude excuse, no real reason to say no. So, we met Uncle Ron for breakfast that morning. I had to explain to the girls who this man was, he had never met them after all. “This is Grammy’s ex-husband, they got a divorce when I was a teenager, I haven’t really talked to him in years, just be nice and it will be fine” I said.

The girls of course were as loveable and cheerful as they have always been and took to Ron immediately. He was cautious though as if he wasn’t sure of himself around us now. Of course, he still had his laughable and gregarious nature about him, the one that makes people want to be around him, telling stories and laughing that full laugh he always had when I was growing up. But something else was there. A tinge of something quiet just on the edge of his voice. He was nervous around us. As we sat there, I couldn’t tell you anything he said. I was just staring at him; inside I was a fury of emotion. Several times I nearly had to get up and leave the table as I was becoming overwhelmed with emotion.

Breakfast ended and I don’t think I said ten words to the man. We walked out and Alicia was taking some pictures with the girls. Mom and dad were talking with Ron and it became time for him and us to leave. I suddenly felt a pang of need. “I’ll walk you to your car”, I said. We walked through the parking lot until we got to his car. We were standing there… not really saying much and I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I burst into tears and grabbed him in a hug. Holding him tight I sobbed uncontrollably, “I miss you, Uncle Ron… I miss you.” We were both crying now. “I don’t want to be angry anymore. I don’t want to be upset anymore. I just want you back.” I said. “I want that too!” He said. “If I can, I want to be your little girl’s grandpa if I can. I know I’ve missed a lot. I know that. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

We most likely stood there for 15 minutes. I don’t honestly remember what we said to each other, but it was a profound healing moment. A letting go of hurts and pain that had been compounding for years on both sides. I got in the car and discussed what had happened with mom, dad, and Alicia. They were skeptical, not sure if we should allow Ron back into our lives too easily. What would Grammy think about it? She had stayed with us throughout the years, not pushed us away, and had even been at my children’s births up to this point, holding them on their first day of life. I never wanted to do anything that would have hurt her. While I would ultimately call her and have a conversation with her about the experience and what it meant to me and to the future, for a while anyway, I just kept it to myself.

D. Michl Lowe

The Coming Of Nikolai

April 8, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

Let me talk about the end of 2018. Kyle and Natalie, our music pastor and his wife, came to us and told us that they were pregnant with their third child. I don’t remember the exact date, but it was mid-2018. In my heart of hearts, I can assure you (my reader) that I was done having children. All through college and perhaps even before that, I had always said that I wanted two little girls; no more, no less. And at that moment, I had my two girls and beyond that, Ellie was already seven years old. Having another child wouldn’t make sense at all.

However, when our friend’s words rang in my mind, a spark began to burn inside of me. I couldn’t shake the idea of another child from my mind. It nearly consumed me. God was pulling at me, causing me to question my conviction. At first, I didn’t talk to Alicia about this. How could I? If I told her about it, she would get excited and if these feelings turned out to be nothing, just a passing fancy, then I would have hurt her a great deal. Inside myself though, I knew she wanted more children. She had always said four, but we had compromised on two. She always said no way to three because she didn’t want the third to be left out. Or for there to be a middle child.

I went and spoke with Kyle about my feelings and thoughts. His immediate response was, “You need to have another kid!” Now I know he must have been a little biased since he and his wife had made a very similar decision. I spoke to him about my hesitations. About all the reasons why it was a crazy idea, why we shouldn’t do it. And then I said that despite all that, I was still convicted about it. I didn’t know why. He told me that he had similar feelings before they had made their decisions and that he had come to have peace about it through prayer. He told me I needed to be in prayer and that I should seek Christ’s will. While I appreciated his enthusiasm and advice, I was still unsure.

I went home and spoke to Alicia about it. I came out of our closet just before bed and said, “What would you think about us having another kid?” She stopped. “Are you being serious?” she asked. “Now, you can’t just bring this up with me, if you are serious you need to let me know. Because I had a peace about us not having any more kids, even though it’s something I have really wanted. You can’t just throw this out there you know.”

I paused in the doorway, considering why I had even mentioned it without having come to a solid conclusion just yet. “I haven’t come to a consensus yet on how I feel, or what God is telling me about it. I don’t have peace, but I felt like I needed to tell you what was on my heart. What do you think about that?” I can’t be sure, but I remember her beginning to cry. “I have a peace about it, I say let’s do it!” I regaled her with all my logical reasons as to why I thought it was a bad idea, and still she held firm. When I spoke to my mom and dad about it later, they held to my beliefs about the bad idea of having another kid. It would be too hard, too expensive, and just overall not a good idea. I didn’t have peace about it. I wasn’t sure.

During this time, I was working up in the sound booth for our local church. I can’t tell you what the sermon was about. I can’t tell you what really was even going on in my own mind at that moment. However, while working the sound for our Facebook live feed, Pastor began to speak and my heart suddenly lurched. All I can recall is that for a moment in time, Pastor was no longer speaking to the congregation, God was speaking through him to me.

All my fear was gone. All my reservations were gone. The logical reasoning, I had built up in my mind seemed like foolishness. God had a plan. I didn’t know what it was, but He had one. I needed to trust in His ability to see us through the challenges. Which is interesting. Nikolai was born on August 31, 2019. It was a mostly uneventful birth, but just a day after he was born, he had to be taken to the NICU because he had an infection in his blood. He was there for about a week until he was strong enough to come home with us. It wouldn’t be the last time one of my kids had an extended stay in a hospital.

Looking back at this time now, after Niko was born, Alicia was able to take off enough time from work so that she could get all the way from the beginning of school in August to Christmas break staying at home with him, fantastic. But God took us a step further. One month after Christmas break, the COVID-19 Pandemic of 2020 hit and we worked from home for the most part until that Summer, giving Alicia just about a full year of staying at home with Niko.

Even when we did have to go back to work (sorta) in the next school year of 2020 in September of that year, Niko was able to only go to daycare part-time, Mom and Dad kept him two days a week, saving us money and allowing him to spend a lot of time with family. God has a way of working these things out. In ways, we will never understand and will often never see until a long time later.

Now, I continue to look at my son (he’s two and a half now) and Kyle’s little girl and I think about these kids. Who they are becoming and who they are right now. The world is a better place with them in it. A friend of mine recently went through a similar situation as I did and I got to hold his little girl (just a couple months old now) in my arms. We were at dinner with them the other night and I looked over at my son and then down at this little girl in my arms. What a blessing children are. I feel like the meaning of life and love and laughter are brought into clarity through these kids. They will grow up in our church, they will be loved by everyone in it, and they will be loved by us. There will be difficulty, pain, heartache, and tears, and it will all be worth it. All the difficulty that comes with having kids and raising kids will be worth it.

D. Michl Lowe

A Mother’s Discipline

April 8, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl Lowe1 Comment

At one point, I don’t remember my age, I had done something wrong and needed to be punished. My mother sat me down looking out a set of windows that faced the backyard. “You sit here until I come to let you up!” She said. I pretended I didn’t care, that the punishment was no big deal. She then went over to the telephone on the wall and called down to the neighbor’s house just below us. These neighbors had three little girls and a little boy. The middle little girl was Ashley, mentioned above. “Hey Chris, would you send your kids up here to play in Michl’s treehouse for a few minutes? Thanks!” and then hung up the phone. I didn’t hear this conversation.

What I saw next was the point of the exercise. All my best friends suddenly appeared and began playing in my backyard. “Hey, mom!” I yelled. “The girls are here; I’m going to go out and play with them!” I was very excited. Mom came into the room. “Oh, I’m sorry, but little boys who don’t listen to their mommies don’t get to go play with their friends. So, no. You are not going out to play with them.” Big tears welled up in my eyes and began running down my cheeks as I suddenly understood the reason, I was facing the backyard. The kids were only playing back there for maybe five minutes at the most, but it was enough to get my attention as a little kid, four or five years old. “Now, if you decide that you are going to listen to mommy for the rest of the day, then maybe tomorrow we will invite the kids up to play with you and then order some pizza for lunch as well. Does that sound like a deal?” It did. Like I said, I don’t remember what I had done, but to this day, that lesson has stuck with me. Take away what is most important to a child and be willing to give it back with a bonus… good parenting advice.

Speaking of eating pizza, it shouldn’t be understated that getting pizza was a big deal when I was a kid. We didn’t have a lot of money because mom and dad were shoving all their extra money into savings to be able to afford to build a house later. Once, Chris Bloss and Mom took all of us kids to McDonald’s so that we could play on the playground there. You weren’t allowed to play on the playground unless you bought something, so Chris and Mom bought a Diet Coke to split. All of us kids had Fox Kids Club Cards. A card you could get from the local radio station that would get you all kinds of cool stuff as a kid, but mainly for us, would get us a free small fry from the Mcdonald’s. So, we brought peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, got our free fries, and then all ordered water, also free and since a diet coke was bought, were allowed to play in the play place.

Looking back at that, it was a little sad, but we didn’t care. We got to play on the playground and had some of the best fries around. Once, when the Bloss’ dad Tom got a bonus at work, Chris decided to buy all of us kids a Slurpee from the Kmart. Back then the only flavor was cherry. She handed them out to us kids and each time she gave one to a kid that kid would say, “Thank you!” and then she would move on to the next kid. Not me though, she handed me that thing and I immediately began downing it. I only made it several slurps in when it was suddenly snatched from my hands. “Next time, you will remember to say thank you.” My mother said. I cried, but you better believe the next time something came along like that, I was the first to say thank you. Manners were important. To this day, I still have a habit of saying, “Yes sir and no sir”, which has fared me well.

D. Michl Lowe

My Grandfather Was A Coward

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

My mother knew nothing about her real father. Even when her mother was brutally murdered by another man, she knew nothing about her real dad; believing her father to be a different man. When her real father revealed himself in her fifties, she was taken aback. A mutual friend apparently was having breakfast with her “dad” down at the local Hardy’s every Tuesday. When she confronted this man who she was told was her “real dad” she was understandably hurt and angry. She asked him, “When my mother was murdered, why didn’t you come to get me? I had no one!” He hung his head, “I was just a poor boxer.” He said, “I didn’t have nothin to offer.”

So why did he contact her then? After all these years, why did he have his breakfast friend reach out to her? Why now? As far as she could tell, it was so he could have a dance partner down at the local Moose Lodge. He was in his late eighties and a little senile, barely able to really comprehend who his relations were. I (her son) went to meet him for the first time and spoke to him about my wife and my kids. “These are your Great Granddaughters”, I told him, showing him a picture of the girls. He smiled and said they looked nice. He didn’t ask anything about me, my wife, or what his great-grandkids liked, or what type of kids they were. Really, there was no discussion about us at all. He either didn’t care or didn’t understand what was really going on.

His days were spent in meaningless pursuits that at his age seemed silly. After a year of knowing about him, all my mother had been a couple of one-sided visits and several uncomfortable phone calls asking her to come dance with him at the Moose Lodge.

Then, he got sick. Sick to the point that it was clear he was going to die. he didn’t ask for any of us. Mom went first to visit him and came away numb. She said, “You don’t have to go.” I went.

I went by myself. I entered the room and saw him lying on the bed, haggard. I ignored the three other people in the room; a friend, his current wife, and his son from another marriage (he never actually married my grandmother). He was unable to speak. Staring at the ceiling he just watched, as if he was expecting something to happen. I stood by the bed and held his hand for some time.

If I am being honest, I hated this so-called man, right or wrong I did. I hated that he wasn’t up to the task of being the father he was called to be. I hated it that he hadn’t stepped up! That he hadn’t ridden in on a white horse and rescued my mom from a childhood of horrors. I hated that in some part, I could see his failures in parts of myself that I abhor. With his hand still in mine, I struggled with what to say. Do you really talk about dying to a person who is facing it? It seemed almost cruel to talk about the encroaching line of eternity that I assumed he was more than aware of.

The pause I took seemed to last for a long time. In the end, I made a decision.

It was a decision that I didn’t care if he wanted to know me or my family. I didn’t care if he was a horrible person who had abandoned his child for the sake of convenience. I didn’t care about any of that. I wanted him to know us. We were worth knowing. However, he would never have the opportunity to do this during his lifetime. His life was over.

I gently squeezed his hand and began to pray over him out loud. “Dear God, my Grandfather doesn’t know you Lord, but I do. I ask you now to open his eyes dear God to Your truth. Help him Lord to ask for Your forgiveness and to believe that you save him even now. So that he might be with you in paradise God…”

After leading him through the sinner’s prayer, I ended it. He couldn’t speak of course. He couldn’t even write or even really smile. I have no idea if he accepted Christ, ignored me, or was even coherent enough to understand what was going on. I kissed his forehead and walked out of the hospital room. I sat in the car beside my wife and wept. I wept for his wasted life, what he had missed. All the amazing relationships and love he had missed out on. He had missed it all.

He was so focused on himself that he had missed the awesomeness God had placed right in front of him. Dear God, help me never miss the goodness you have given to me. Help me not to embrace the cowardice in my blood. Help me to grab life by the throat and wring out every good thing you so generously provide. Help me not to be afraid of living life for You, of being the father you have called me to be.

D. Michl Lowe

The Importance Of Writing For Your Children

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I’m going to be headed home today to meet with my wife and two kids, along with my parents to cut into a cake. It’s not a birthday cake or a retirement cake or anything like that, it’s a gender reveal cake.

My wife will give birth (God willing) to our third child in September of this year and she wanted our current kids (8 and 6 years old) to have some fun guessing the gender along with us through this now iconic practice of the pink and blue inner confection hidden inside a cake.

Maybe I’m just a weird dude (I admit it, I am), but I can’t help but think about my own death today, hopefully, years down the road. With the new life rapidly developing within my best friend and lover, I wonder what I am actually leaving my children. I’m not a rich man, so money isn’t going to be a legacy I leave behind. I’m also not a powerful man, I don’t leave them a company or family business to run. I’m not a politician or influential man.

I am a Christian man.

I hope before everything else, I am leaving them a legacy of living out Jesus in front of them. The leftists often accuse the right and Christians of “brainwashing” our kids into following our religious beliefs.

-raises his hand-

I’m guilty your honor. I am doing everything within my power to lead my children into a relationship with the God of all creation. Let’s be honest, if you held the belief that God became a human being and came down to earth to save everyone and actually did it through His death and then resurrection, you would be a fool to NOT lead your children into a relationship with this being.

The reality is, the left doesn’t believe there is a God and therefore doesn’t believe we should teach our children this “myth”. The reality is, they indoctrinate their own children just as strongly into the myth that something came from nothing.

It’s not a matter of faith or no faith, but rather where one’s faith is placed.

I also am a writer. So far I’ve written nearly three books, only one of which is physically published, Modern Chivalry (can be found on Amazon), the other two I’ve published on this site for people to read and enjoy.

Many of the articles that I’ve written I wrote with the knowledge that someday my kids will read them. I have a series of letters I’ve written to my girls, just in case I am someday gone too soon. I’ve written down all my good dad talks about life, love, relationship, God, etc. in case I’m not there to give these talks in person.

I’m so excited to know if I will be having my first little boy, or if I am going to be so outnumbered by girls that I have no hope of surviving 😳.

However, more than anything else, I pray that God will allow me to continue to write so that someday my kids can read my writings and find comfort in having a small part of their dad still alive. Still fresh. Still vivid upon a page.

A long time ago my dad received a cedar trunk with a latch holding it closed. It was his dad’s trunk. Opening it, it was full to the brim with yellow spiral notebooks and newspaper clippings. My grandfather wrote thousands of letters to the editor of his local paper. There were poems and letters and short stories and histories. I remember sitting in my dad’s attic for hours pouring over these writings and even though my grandfather died when my dad was just 13 years old, I felt as though I knew this man.

I think I can honestly say, I know this man.

Someday, I hope to meet him when I die. I believe I will have that chance. This is the power of writing, to live on after death, not in a spiritual sense, but in a very real physical sense, for those who get to know you after you are gone.

D. Michl Lowe

Abortion Is The Man’s Fault

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

The sin of abortion that is plaguing the world right now, is the fault of men. This crown of death should be laid squarely at our feet. The failure and sin of men have resulted in this unborn holocaust. We are to blame. Our failure in stepping up as fathers has forced the hands of women into accepting the extreme solution of murder. Do our ladies have blood on their hands as well? Of course, but if certain sins could be called worse than others, ours as men is the greater by far.

I am not surprised by the left’s attack on the unborn. It isn’t surprising when evil people support and come up with, evil ideas. However, as I sat there thinking about abortion and what it’s doing to our country, I thought about my own role (or lack thereof) in the death of these millions of children. What should be done? Legislation and voting are important, but how do I respond to this? It’s not like this is a new issue. This was an issue before I was even born.

I can’t help but look at men. Yes, the welfare system and its substitution as the provider have given men an “out”, but that is no excuse. I watch as I see man after man, fading into selfish listlessness. Are there no men left willing to take on the role of father? Sadly, I think fathers are far and few between. Too few men are stepping into the role with the vigor and haste that was the norm in the past. Where are all the warriors ready to live out lives of selfless sacrifice? I think of my own father. The nights he spent driving from one place to another to fix computers; hours and hours on the road servicing computers in three states for General Electric back in the 80s and 90s.

He worked hard. He provided. I am everything I am today because he was a man. A real man. Work wasn’t something that was questionable, it was how he was able to dig himself out of the poverty he was born into. Hard work was how he came to give me and my mom a home, education, and honestly nicer things than we could have ever thought. He wasn’t worried about the next thrill, the next personal ambition, the next woman he could con into his bed. He was worried about making his family better off than the generation he came from. It’s that unselfish ambition for the family that should be pushing and fueling our men.

Beyond even family, Christ calls all men into service for others. A man who takes care of his wife is a man who has a purpose. A man who serves Christ is a man with meaning in his life. It doesn’t take much… be there and be a dad to your kids. Be a husband to your wife. If the relationship doesn’t work out, then realize that your devotion to mom and the kids doesn’t end because you are no longer together. How is Christ calling you to love your ex-wife? How is he calling you to serve her? Even when she is unfair to you. Even when she doesn’t let you see the kids as much as you would like. How does Christ call you to serve her and the kids? I know this is an overly simplistic thought. “It’s not that easy I hear you saying.” I know. I know it’s not that easy, but Christ still calls us to serve and be a man. Being a man is about sacrifice. It’s about learning you aren’t the most important person here. Get up and get your head on straight; be a man.

D. Michl Lowe

Whatever You Do, Don’t Talk About The Truth

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I recently sat in a diversity meeting. The higher-ups had invited clergy from around our area and were there to talk about how to help people be “good” in our society; how to be a good person. Excited did not even begin to describe my enthusiasm for this section of the training we were at. It’s not often that a secular institution would invite clergy in to speak about such a topic.

However, my enthusiasm quickly faded as religious leader after religious leader sat behind their podiums and twaddled on about positive self-esteem and treating people with respect. While these ideas are good ideas, they pale in comparison to what they could have spoken about; the truth of how Jesus Christ purifies all people who would call upon his name, believe in Him, and turn from their sin. I sat in this conference room with nearly a hundred people from the secular counseling world and fumed. Here were the supposed religious leadership of our local community and none of them ever even mentioned the name of Jesus.

They were given a golden ticket into the enemy’s camp and squandered the chance to speak the name of Christ to people who may never step foot into a church. Let’s be honest though, should I have been surprised? Should I have expected anything less? Today, we are seeing the opposite of what Jesus saw in his time. People aren’t overly religious, being held up by rules and regulations, they are overly focused on self, believing that they are good enough without Christ or the Bible. It is said, that these ideas are outdated. As long as we are just “good people” we will be fine.

In 2004, my wife and I were newly married. We had just moved back to my hometown of Charleston in West Virginia so that I could start on my master’s degree in counseling at Marshal University. We found ourselves in a church down in South Charleston and were attempting to get plugged into the community there. It was around this time that I discovered Rob Bell’s book, Velvet Elvis. Along with this book, I also found his short video series called Nooma. It’s not without some chagrin that I tell you that I loved this guy! He was speaking about the Bible and Christianity in a new and interesting way. It got me excited to delve into the Bible again with renewed vigor for the truth that could be uncovered there.

My excitement was short-lived. Mr. Bell’s edginess in looking at the Gospel soon devolved into meaningless prattle. First with his book called Love Wins and then later with a book called The Zimzum of Love. The former (Love Wins) basically outlines how Mr. Bell no longer believes in a literal Hell. While the latter (The Zimzum of Love), details how he believes homosexual marriage is equal to heterosexual marriage. Now, those two thoughts aren’t the only thoughts in these books, but each also disqualifies much of what is said as being relevant to the Christian person. Save to give us an understanding of depravity.

Rob Bell is just one of many “spiritual leaders” in our time that is falling short. Sometimes getting the praise (and money) by appealing to the Oprah crowd is just too much for some people to turn away from. It’s easy to please the majority. It’s easy to speak what you know will get you “likes” and “hearts” when you post online or even stand to speak. Let’s be honest though, many times, it’s not those that stand, but those that continue to sit that are the ones who are truly lost. Jesus being the only way and the only truth is a headstoned idea in the mind of the public at large.

I’m going to be honest with you my reader. I’m sick of this. The poison of not only society but also of the “church” is like bile rising in my throat. Retching, I am ready to partake of some real food. Something that doesn’t taste sweet at first only to give me indigestion later. I want substance. I want meaning. I want the Truth of the Gospel. I’m ready to get serious about what it means to be a Christian. Are you ready to come with me? To look at Christianity in a way that will transform your life? Because let’s be honest, if your life looks exactly like the lives of the non-Christians around you, are you truly a Christian at all? There needs to be a death in the Church. Christians need to understand that for Christ to live, they must die. They must embrace the death of self.

D. Michl Lowe

Toxic Masculinity

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I feel like Rambo is getting a bad rap these days. His way of dealing with problems is frowned upon. There’s no room for blowing stuff up, kicking butt and taking names, or lighting your cigar with the red-hot barrel of an AK47. I jest, but really things that have been seen as manly are largely shunned these days. That’s not to say that Rambo-type stereotypes are all there is to be manly, of course not, but almost anything that might be considered masculine is frowned upon.

The term that is thrown around most of the time is called “toxic masculinity”. Which basically asserts that behaviors, social norms, and ideals that are associated with being masculine are harmful to men, women, and society as a whole. When first introduced by Shepard Bliss in 2017, we see that it wasn’t necessarily a bad term. It was meant to point out some of the negative aspects of society that are most often associated with men; things like rape, physical bullying, sexual assault, and domestic violence. However, in the years following Bliss’ original article and thesis, we have seen this term morph into something beyond Bliss’ original intention.

These days, toxic masculinity has become a catch-all to entrap any overtly masculine appearing behavior and then label it as a problem. Even going so far as demonizing the idea of being a gentleman to a lady. I’ve actually had a woman tell me I insulted her for opening a door for her and allowing her to pass through before myself. As if this simple act of service was insulting to her. As if she couldn’t open the door for herself. It struck me as… odd.

If there is toxic masculinity, which I would argue is just toxic (or maybe sinful?) behavior that is open to both sexes and not just men, then I would say as men and society, we have lost what it means to treat each other and society properly in general. So, I would say it’s not so much toxic masculinity, but toxic behaviors in general that need to be looked at and expunged. In the US and from what I am reading, in many parts of the world, we have lost this idea of service to others and to God.

When Nietzsche declared that “God is dead” back in 1882, he was talking about how the enlightenment period had killed the idea of an all-powerful creator God. Today, I think we have seen that our enlightenment has brought about great good, but also a moral failing as well. Things like equal rights, pulling masses of people out of poverty, and self-government have all been societal goods, but then we look at the selfishness that is so prevalent today and it gives me pause to say that we are completely better off. Our reliance and dependence on our governments have led to us pushing off our responsibilities to family, friends, and neighbors. We allow the government to take care of them. We don’t take the time to talk to people to find out how they are truly doing. We look on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter to know what’s going on, but fail to dig deeper with those we care about.

Most of our time is spent staring off into the bright glow of meaningless entertainment. Numbing our minds to the emotional plight that is raging around us. My wife recently got a letter in the mail (shocking I know), from a lady at our church. It was a simple typed letter that talked to her about what this lady had been praying for and how she was feeling about my wife’s family and our place in the local church. It wasn’t anything mind-blowing, it wasn’t anything that long or detailed, it was just a moment of connection.

Men are getting the brunt of the harshness. They are prodded, shamed, and pushed into a box that is largely feminine in nature. Now don’t get me wrong, femininity is amazing. I was walking with my wife the other evening and we were talking. She is about halfway through her pregnancy with my first son. He was asleep in her tummy, since to him, he was being gently rocked by his mommy, while she walked for the 30-minute stroll we try to take each night. I told her how beautiful I thought she was. She laughed and said, “I don’t feel like it sometimes right now.” But honestly, seeing my wife carrying my son, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Masculinity though is meant for men. Just as femininity is meant for women.

Men are meant to be strong.

Not completely in the physical sense, but in general, this should be an aspect that is ascribed to them. I think about that scene from Forest Gump, where Lieutenant Dan has lost his legs and manages to reach up and pull Gump onto the floor to chastise him for saving his life. Throughout the remainder of the film, this seemingly crippled man manages to pull his life back together. I don’t think we would call him an effective warrior any longer and without legs, he wouldn’t be winning any races on his lack of feet, but we would most certainly call him a strong man. Strong in the heart in this case. I think this is often something that is misunderstood. Being emotionally strong means being able to control your emotions. While it is often frowned upon, the father who tells his son not to cry is not trying to distance his son from emotionality, but trying to help them to understand how to control their emotions.

Men are meant to be in control of their emotions.
It’s not that we aren’t emotional beings, we are. But showing those emotions at the wrong time can leave others around us feeling vulnerable and unprotected. There is a comfort in being able to lean on a man who is resolute in his firm understanding of the emotional state of those around him. I rarely saw my own father cry. It was comforting to me as a young boy to know I had a strong and emotionally stable man who was in control of the world I inhabited. I know now that he often felt vulnerable and not up to the tasks at hand, but his outward appearance and stance were always that of confidence and of being in control. I would say that I personally fail at this aspect of masculinity. I cry during movies at the drop of a hat.

Men are meant to be protectors.

There’s often a push to limit violence in men. I understand this to some degree. Violence can become consuming. Allowing ourselves to become obsessed with violence, revel in it, to link it to sexual acts, or enjoy the pain and misery of others is a problem. However, violence in and of itself is not a bad thing. I know that’s a very controversial thing to say, but I truly do believe that in our world’s fallen state, violence is a necessary tool to combat the evil in the world. While I don’t want to go into the issue of transgenderism in this writing, I do think about the recent inclusion of transgendered women (biological men) in sports is very telling. After transgendered women are allowed to compete in women’s sporting events, the record after the record is broken. According to an article on AOL.com by Alex Lasker, “Mary Gregory, an American powerlifter and strength coach, took to Instagram on Sunday to announce she [sic] had gone “9 for 9” at the competition and broken four women’s world records: Masters world squat record, open-world bench record, Masters world deadlift record and Masters world total record.” This man posing as a woman easily smashed world-record-holding women in this sport and we have seen this time and again in many sports.

D. Michl Lowe

The Modern Christian Man

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

It was 2013, and I was standing behind the register of a local Game Stop. I was still in Grad school for counseling at the time so working at a dead-end job like this gave me what was supposed to be a reprieve from all the studying. Instead, it was one of the best classes on human behavior I could have ever taken.

Let’s get something straight; I like video games. I still play them online with friends. However, working at Game Stop gave me a glimpse into how many men see the world and act upon it. When I say “act upon it” what I really mean is, run from it. I saw men and boys time after time come into the store searching for something. Being a “game advisor” part of my job was to go talk to these people and find out what they were looking for.

Over and over, after speaking with these men, they were looking for meaning. Oh, it would come out in different words than that, but they were always looking for the same thing, purpose, and meaning. Players of World of Warcraft at the time were seeking adventure and a place to belong. Players of Halo wanted to have the feeling of being important in a story. They wanted to know that their actions had an impact; even if that impact was a fictional one.

I find this type of lostness even today. More so maybe. Men continually seek war to wage only to punt on their lives and get lost in meaningless activities. Is it no wonder that we have “man-boys” living in their parent’s basements living out a fantasy where they are the ruler of a kingdom or the hero in some made-up interactive story. It gives the illusion of fulfillment to sex that is starving for it.

So what is the answer? I believe a lot of this comes down to how we choose to raise our sons. Do we call them to action? Do we call them into a purposeful life filled with the challenge of raising a family and providing for them, protecting them? Do we call them to hard work? Creating in them an understanding of purpose through the very sweat of their brow (or exertion of their minds)? We need to be hard on our boys to raise them into the men that Christ has called us to be. To instill respect and meaning through Biblical teaching and the harsh reality of rising to meet the expectations of us, their fathers. No son? No problem. Work to be a man who leads the youth through example. Still a youth yourself? Find a man (hopefully it’s your own dad) who exemplifies what it means to be a man and follow that man!

We can change our country. We can change our world. Be a man who is silken iron; gentle but strong, responsible and hard-working, dependable and honest. It isn’t too late.

D. Michl Lowe

What I Believe

March 18, 2022October 18, 2022 D. Michl LoweLeave a comment

I believe that God came to earth to reveal Himself to the world. There might be a lot we still don’t understand about him, but I believe that He gave us his Word to make knowing Him easier.

I believe He is a God of reason and understanding and that He is not bound by those things. He can do things outside of the bounds of reason and can accomplish things beyond our human understanding. I also think that it doesn’t matter if He does these things because we wouldn’t understand or be able to reason it anyway.

His thoughts are higher than mine.
I believe He is all-good, all-knowing, and all-powerful. I also believe that part of being all-powerful is the ability to limit the powers available to Him at any given time to be able to converse or directly affect humanity. As an example, just because I have access to the nearly infinite knowledge available on my phone that has access to Google Search, I don’t have to choose to have access to that nearly infinite knowledge at all times. Even if God did decide to have complete access to all known outcomes and knowledge, He can choose to keep that knowledge outside of His perceived knowledge if He would so choose.

I believe in absolute truth. I think that we as humans are able to know some things that are true and some that are not true. God in His ultimate knowledge gave us reason so that we might be able to discern truth as filtered through scripture first, prayer second, and then the counsel of Godly peoples third. In this way, we can understand the will of God and how we play into that will.

I believe Jesus died to pay the ransom of the sin we owed. Because of this, we are able to believe in Him, repent of our sins, and put our trust in Him. We will have eternal life with Him in heaven if we do that. It’s that simple, yet also that complex. I believe in marriage between one man and one woman as God’s ideal union for humans here on earth. He gives us this example in Genesis with Adam and Eve and continues it through scripture. I believe sex outside of marriage is a sin. Because of this, I believe all homosexual sex is a sin. It can’t happen within the bounds of Biblical marriage and therefore is a sin.

We can also see homosexual acts mentioned throughout scripture that are said to be in as well. I don’t believe that the state marries anyone. They might recognize “marriage” as they define it, but this is not the same as marriage within a Biblical context. I believe beyond specific scriptures, that the overall tone of the Bible gives us a model for marriage. We (as the Church) are called the “bride” of Christ. God uses the model of a man and woman engaged in marriage to symbolize his relationship with the Church. It is clear that his intention for marriage is one man and one woman.

I believe that God calls us as His children to love Him above all else. Because of this, I give priority in my life as follows:

God
Family
Others
Liberty
Self
Sword (The call to be a protector)

God, family, and others should be pretty clear as the order of relevance, but I’m sure Liberty, Self, and Sword cause you to have questions.

Liberty is the idea that our country (the USA) is special. In the USA, we have done things no other country has ever dreamed of. God has truly blessed this country. I believe we are a shining city on a hill. Without the USA, the world would be a dark place indeed. So when I say the pledge of allegiance to our flag, I mean every word of it. I believe in our Constitution and the Bill of Rights.

Self is next on the list. It is a call to preserve the body I have been given as a temple to the Lord. I am to honor the Lord with my body. This means I should keep it safe, feed it well, keep it fit, and make sure everything it does brings honor to Christ on his throne.

The Sword is the last one. It has to do with a man’s calling to protect what the Lord has given to him. This takes many forms, but mostly covers the protection of others and self through force of arms (if need be as a last resort), protection of truth (through standing up for it in the public square), and protection of finances through providing money through work. It should be noted that this includes the defense of one’s homeland through the Military and/or Militia.

I believe the state may take life as punishment for terrible crimes. Humans may take life in defense of themselves or others. This is not a legal statement, but a moral one.

I believe that once the egg and sperm combine, it is a human life and should be considered sacred. All peoples are created in the image of God and therefore have innate value. To end a human life for convenience or when it is not in defense is murder. If there is a choice between the life of the mother or child, whichever has the most viability should be given preference to survival. Each life is equal in value, the mother and the child.

D. Michl Lowe

Author D. Michl Lowe

Author D. Michl Lowe’s Blog

Category: Christian Living

The Lesson I Learned from an Icee

The Loss and Gain from the Pandemic

One Last Hug

Even Stuffies Have Scars

I am Fragile and Vulnerable

I Saved Over The Book I’m Writing! 😳

The Blessing of Lost Sleep

Is There Absolute Truth?

Finding God In The Mundane

Swimming into Patience with Other Believers

The Hero We Need

The Sacrifice Of The Self

The Need for Honorable Men

The Armed Woman: Raising Shield Maidens

Eight Christian Parenting Thoughts

Would I Marry My Wife Again?

Christian Non-violence

Unpopular Ideas in My Circle

Abortion Addressed

Striking Out in Fatherhood

When I Die, Freeze Me And Pound Me In The Ground

How To Get Into Heaven Without Becoming A Christian

The Four Qualities Of An Accountability Partner

The Christians Have Failed

The Death Of The Self

The Problem Of Sin

The Wayward Uncle

The Coming Of Nikolai

A Mother’s Discipline

My Grandfather Was A Coward

The Importance Of Writing For Your Children

Abortion Is The Man’s Fault

Whatever You Do, Don’t Talk About The Truth

Toxic Masculinity

The Modern Christian Man

What I Believe

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